Please pray for my wife Rachael. She went out to see her counsellor, and has not come home yet. *Edit* I worried that she is capable of taking her life, and may be making plans to do so *Edit*.
She'd die of embaressment if she knew that I was postining this, as she is an extremely private person, but I am afraid, and can't do this on my own.
Thanks in advance.
Will pray.
Maybe there are other Christians you know who could pray for you wife, and perhaps fast too?
Details are not necessary, as long as they are willing to pray with you, it will help your wife and you also as you seek God.
God bless.
Aaron,
... fear not dear brother.
Father...
Aaron, I pray she returns home safely. Don't underestimate the strength of God's existence in her, and don't underestimate the strength of a Christian marriage that reflects God'd glory - She may just need some time to herself to get some perspective.
Trust that God wants what is best for you and will never abandon you.
Joshua 1:5 - No-one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you.
Proverbs 3:5 - Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
Have faith, Aaron. Please post a message when she gets home ok? God bless. Anna. x
Will pray Aaron.
Praying here also...
Ron
Munchkin wrote:
Have faith, Aaron. Please post a message when she gets home ok? God bless. Anna. x
She's just got home. Thanks for your prayers. It's not over yet, but at least she's home:cry:.
Thanks again, I'm deeply humbled.
you have my prayers and intercession.
It's not over yet, but at least she's home
Continuing... Know it is getting late there brother... that the Lord grant you both rest and His peace.
Thank you for your prayers. I thought I'd better update you all, because I have had a few queries. Let's just say, it's not over yet, but things are better than when I put out the request.
Dealing with depression is a cyclic roller coaster ride, but things are improving:-). I think that your prayers are having greatest work in myself, personally. Since Thursday night, I have been blessed with increase patience and understand that goes beyond mere comprehension.
For those who know little about depression, it makes life have the perception of being difficult, to the point of impossibility, causing many to become suicidal out of utter despair. This suicidal tendancy is not one of mere selfishness, but of hopelessness. For Rach, it is a matter of "I see how my behvaiour affects you and the children, so I must conclude that you would be far better without me." Being a Christian, she would not divorce, as she knows that that would lead to a life of celibacy for me, until she dies, or returns (not I'm not going to discuss that issue, it is settled for me, whether it is for you or not), or adultery, which is to sin against God. Considering all this, the only alternative that she can see is suicide, as that would "liberate" our family from being obliged to her.
This is where another component of depression shows; it isn't very rational. Because the suicide would lead to the possible ruin of the lives of our children (and me for that matter), who will inevitably take upon themselves the blame for the whole thing, no matter how hard she, or anyone else, tried to persuade them otherwise.
Now the thing is, put all these thoughts into a depressed mind, and you have a self propelling problem, where your "damned if you don't" and "damned if you do", so to speak. It's like this, depressed people react in ways that hurt people. Then the depressed one's depression worsens, due to the shame of realising that their behaviour contributed to that person being hurt. Then the hurt one reacts in a "non productive" manner, where emotions like fear, and shame manifest as rage and detachment, which in turn hurts the depressed one.
In the mind of the depressed one, go thoughts like, "I wish I could handle the noise that my children make when they're having fun", which are offest with "That noise is driving me nuts", and comes out, "Will you just shut up!! I can't handle the noise!!" This doesn't sound like much, but it is often being directed at her four year old daughter. Then there is the guilt of the explosion, wishing it could be taken back, and the cycle begins again.
Anyway, put an opinionated person like me into the mix (really, I know you don't think that I'm like that ;-)), and not only do you feel bad about what you're going through, but now you understand in minute detail, why you should "have cause" to feel bad.
Anyway, somehow, I've have been able to hold back my opinions, while still dishing out my love. I've been exceedingly humbled by the whole experience, bacxuase I know that it is not me, it is God in me. Thanks again to all who have been praying for us, I covet them still, and look forward to being able to say we are through all this.
it is God in me
[u]Show
Praise the LORD for giving you more time!
I will be praying for you both.
CJaKfOrEsT wrote:
Thank you for your prayers. I thought I'd better update you all, because I have had a few queries. Let's just say, it's not over yet, but things are better than when I put out the request.
Just had another turn around. Rach went out today for some time to her self, and has desided that she made the wrong decision of Thursday night. Thankfully, she rang her counseller to tell her, and she talked her into staying at her house for a couple of days, to be around someone "safe" (ie, no expectations, and minimal reactions from outbursts, etc).
Once again trusting God, who dwells in darkness. I once pondered Psalm 91:1 "He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High, shall abide in the shadow of the Almighty" and thought, "How can One who [b]is
My hope and prayer is that I nor Rach are amongst the "one thousand" and "ten thousand" that "shall fall" on either side of the abider. Oh Lord, that I would abide in Thee, and that Rach would with me.
Hi Aaron,
Two burdens amongst many ... Maybe it is in emphasis but yourself and Rachel and the young man about to be adopted by an unholy alliance [url=https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=12598&forum=48#101486]devestated
Anyway, somehow, I've have been able to hold back my opinions, while still dishing out my love.
It changes the whole dynamic, it is a different kind of love, a different kind of compassion, a different kind of patience and a whole other realm of intercession. Utter dependence, only the Lord...
Continuing for you both
Father,
In the name of Jesus, the Name above all Names.
Please touch Rachael and Aaron.
You alone are able to do this.
Sometimes people take things like this lightly, but You never do, for You are touched with the feelings of our infirmities, and was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin.
Take care of this situation, and bring Your Peace, as only You can do.
Only You can heal any part of your Creation, so please touch Rachaels mind.
Let her know You love her in spite of what she is going through.
We ask You for Mercy in this situation.
In Jesus Name. Amen
Thank God, Rachael is Home.
CJaKfOrEsT wrote:
Just had another turn around. Rach went out today for some time to her self, and has desided that she made the wrong decision of Thursday night. Thankfully, she rang her counseller to tell her, and she talked her into staying at her house for a couple of days, to be around someone "safe" (ie, no expectations, and minimal reactions from outbursts, etc).
I have a praise report!!! Today I received my fisrt communication from Rach, in the form of an SMS message. The words "10Q 4 being patient with me" came to my cellphone at 12:50pm this afternoon.
Though it is a mere "cloud the size of a mans hand", it has filled my heart with intense joy. Her counsellor has recommended that she say with her until the weekend, so that she can come home refreshed before having to face two needy children's demands.
The kids are surprisingly okay, and probably more at peace than normal. They have been told what's going on, in terms that a 4 and 6 year old can grasp, withoiut scarring them for life. They know that "Mummy's sick, and her sickness makes her sad. She's spending a little time away, so she can get some rest, because she's afraid that she she might get angry with you, even though you have done nothing wrong. She loves you very much, and doesn't want you to think that she doesn't like you."
In the midst of this all, the Lord has shown me so much about myself, and Him. Thank you for all your prayers, they have been as a life line for me, as I learn what it is to "[b]Count
:-D
I rejoice with you Aaron. The cloud the size of a man's hand was the beginning of a great rain. Elijah had put his head between his knees he prayed so hard. Glory to the name of the Lord!
This is great news.
May your wife continue to compute how much she is valued for herself, regardless of any outward image in which she feels (or knows) she falls short.
I have been thinking about them, because I wanted to suggest .... you may be doing this already .... that when you pray with them at bedtime .... I mean, when they pray with you at bedtime.... they be included in fellowship with the Father to ask for Him to 'make Mummy better'.The kids are surprisingly okay, and probably more at peace than normal.
They are not too small to do this, nor to understand that God is doing what He can, though it will take time, and sometimes it might be hard for Mummy to know what God is saying to her or how He is trying to heal her.
I don't mean you should go through all this at one sitting with them, but that you should think through a few answers to obvious questions, and encourage them to believe God is working silently and in His own ways. They will learn something about faithfulness in prayer, and patience, and leaving things in God's hands, and in the end, will have the joy of knowing our Father in heaven heard them and answered, when Rachael is finally delivered from all her sorrows.
CJaKfOrEsT,
There is nothing too big or too small for the lord. I will bear you and your family up in my prayers.
Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear, for I am with you;do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand
Amen
Hi CJaKfOrEsT...
Thank you for updating us. Please know that there are many people praying. Our God is exceedingly great. If "his eye is on a sparrow," this situation is certainly in his mind. Be encouraged!
:-)
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