"In retrospect, the most valuable lesson so far is to die with the Lord and to live after death, taught by Heavenly Father. Jesus and his disciples repeatedly emphasized that we must sacrifice ourselves to carry the cross. This is indeed not a tough job on us but the grace of all Heavenly graces. Ever since God forced me to have a taste of this grace, I cannot live without it. Every night I pray to God that I would die: let my flesh die along with the sinful nature it produces (Ga. 5:24); let my worldly wisdom completely die (I Co. 7:29-31). I know very clearly that if I don't die I won't be able to reserve a piece of holy dwelling in my heart to greet the descending of God; if I don't die I won't be able to feel the urge and fellowship of the Spirit; and if I don't die the Lord Jesus will not fully live in me.
I was reading a book named Serve the Lord Wholeheartedly. The author Oswald Chambers wrote in the Section of Do you walk along in white robe? "A Christian must go through a white funeral before he can be raised from the dead." Death comes before resurrection, i.e., resurrection in the life of Jesus Christ. Death means you no longer exist. Are you really at the end of your life? Do you have the courage to say to God: This is my last day on earth! Do not walk around the graveyard and refuse to die. Remember, if there is no death, holiness is but empty talk!
Why should I give up the world and put my old self to death? Is it for some kind of personal pleasure? Is it for self-cultivation? Not at all. God wants me to fix my eyes on Him and Him alone and He forces me to come close to Him. He knows this is the only way for me to withstand the heavenly visions, power and personality and to spread the Gospel."
Zhiming Yuan