Humbly Request Prayer

Can anyone share a similiar story, I need encouragement. I feel like I've been rejected.

What you've shared is basically the on-going story of my life. A season of heated prayer and Bible study...then a cool down. Another season of consistent prayer and scripture devotion...and another cool down. Don't beat yourself up, and don't let the impulses of rejection swamp your mind. I'll be honest with you: when we allow ourselves to be swayed from the times of fervent devotion and intimacy with God, it's as if we fight an uphill battle to get back to where we were. The hardest thing is picking up where we left off, because our inadequacies and failures are all too near and vibrant and pulsating. We try to pray and suddenly our heads are assulted with disjointed thoughts and vivid memories of recent defeats.

The key I've found is to always, no matter what is happening, look to Jesus. See, you can always look to Jesus and just be silent and know He is God. You don't have to utter a single word or brood over an open Bible. Sometimes you just can't pray, just can't read, just can't do anything but throw up your hands in surrender. Take comfort knowing that He knows the secrets of your heart, the true desires and pain from the drifting, all the defeats you lament over. Take comfort in that He knit you together in the womb of your mother and he knows you better than you know yourself. He called you out of the world; He knows how to keep you. Look to Jesus, trust Jesus. Wait on Jesus. You can [i]always[/i] look to Jesus and lay the burden upon Him and surrender, surrender, surrender. His yoke is easy, the burden light.

Actual resolve (that is, manifestly having the freedom to pray as before) may not come right away, but you just keep looking. God sometimes hides His face for a season, and if He is hiding His face from you, it is a good sign. These are times of growth and testing and maturity. Be still, be silent and know he is God. Times of refreshing will come soon, and you'll find yourself restored and closer to Him than you were before the fall.

Brother Paul :cry: -> :-)

You don't have to utter a single word or brood over an open Bible. Sometimes you just can't pray, just can't read, just can't do anything but throw up your hands in surrender. Take comfort knowing that He knows the secrets of your heart, the true desires and pain from the drifting, all the defeats you lament over. Take comfort in that He knit you together in the womb of your mother and he knows you better than you know yourself. Look to Jesus, trust Jesus. Wait on Jesus. You can always look to Jesus and lay the burden upon Him and surrender, surrender, surrender. His yoke is easy, the burden light.

Thank you for posting this...I soooo needed it.

Praise be to God!

I soooo needed it.

Brother, I can't tell you the times I've been so weak and confused and saturated with failure that all I could do is hang my head in shame and whisper, "O Lord, thou knowest."

Sometimes that is all we can do...and all that is needed.

Brother Paul

Thank you brother Paul!

Compliments, know from recent days and the other post that we are both in slightly crossing paths here ... What I mean is I may have only preceded you by a matter of days in a 'return' to that which I knew and even desired yet ... kept going to distraction, even [i]good[/i] distraction, the scriptures, books, here ... before just laying myself out in prayer.

Brother you will get back to it and I will pray that you do, but you must also pray for me as well, deal? ;-)

Something I picked up a long time ago reading about A.W. Tozer was his penchant for laying on the floor while he prayed. It is somewhat ironic that my wife, long before we were married got a hold of this 'kneeler' that is kept here in the room, the 'office' if you will. I have folded up the rug my mother made for me a couple of years ago and there is where I sprawl out and pray. But what I really wanted to mention was that Tozer also used to just lay still and not utter anything, even in his thought's I am supposing from the accounts, just to worship in silence, to be still ... maybe it is to truly allow the groanings to be uttered without any cognizance that the Holy Spirit is doing just this through us.

Of course I would add that I find it remarkably impossible to do this .... most of the time. But here is why generally speaking. You have probably heard of the 'pressing through' or however it is couched, it is alluding me at the moment, what seems to happens is to quit to soon. What I have found often, even recently, is once I get done preaching in my head, or getting all the 'noise' to calm down ... "Are you finished?" this intimation from the Lord that I am finally ready to 'hear' whatever it is the Lord might be saying. A certain ... calming down can come in. Have likewise found the drift even as these things, whatever they may be are dwelt on and then carried further into extrapolations, other thoughts and scriptures coming to mind, it can be very good and also very much leading off track so there is a catching if you will when this begins to happen, a drawing back to silence the mind and ask the Lord where or what, if there is more or ... Am halting and jumping in and out here as there is so much that comes to mind from praying. There are times when I will bound from the floor to the scriptures and back again. Times where I will just sit and read chapters and sections and stop and pray for understanding even while there is an undergirding spirit of prayer in general while reading. Short things. Sometimes what is 'heard' is, let me try that again, most times what I hear by way of intimation is usually very short, a sentence, something foreign to what I may be thinking at all ... those are precious things when you recognize they are from the Lord, worthy of a lot of concentration. Ah brother .. it varies! That is the beauty of prayer. All I know is this. There is [i]no waste[/i] no matter what, if we can just lay out or kneel or what have you and not say a word, think a single thought (Good luck!) and just be there in His presence with the purpose of doing so ... The best way I can put it is to not do it is ruin and failure and I think you already recognize this in the sense I could only hope to convey it, not in absolutes or disaster ... there is still all kinds of praying going on underneath out in life in general. Brother I am striving to get this out so bear with me, it very much off the cuff.

On the one hand there is the discipline aspect, that 'taking our thoughts by the scruff of the neck' that I mentioned elsewhere and [i]making[/i] ourselves do that which we don't feel like doing, you alluded to a bit here;

the very thing that I have always enjoyed doing.

'enjoyed'

Brother, I hear you but I also realize that there is something in us that shrinks from pain as well. And prayer, intercession is often painful, deeply painful. We are opening ourselves up to the gaze of All of the universe for one and the pain of suffering of others, vicariously certainly but times where it defies explanation ... a quote for you;

[i]All vital praying makes a drain on a man's vitality. True intercession is a sacrifice, a bleeding sacrifice.[/i]
~ J.H. Jowett

I recognize that you are not saying everything by way of enjoyment as well. There can be a sense of ... acknowledgment? if that is the word I want even from these deeply difficult times of prayer. It carries over though, into the life of the day.

Remember! Another great encouragement, to just recall ... to go back to first days of conversion, I know some have never let go of these and have stayed stagnant but the opposite extreme is to put them away forever, such rubbish! In my case I often have gone back to marvel at the ways and the leadings ... no preacher, no specific 'witness', no Church, no nothing just a steady increase of pressure that had [i]the Hound of Heaven[/i] on my heels, in my circumstances, as if the whole world had been tilted off it's axis just to dislodge the one stubborn pebble from it's last crevice it was holding on to and that fool was me. It's incredible and I am stunned and amazed even still to just think on it ... every time. What in the world do You want to have to do with me? Such peculiar love ...

In no way have you been rejected, it is equal parts discipline and fight and that paradox of 'giving up', crying Uncle. Fight through it until you can give up, maybe that's it!

There is so much to pray for brother and much joy in doing so. The sins of the flesh and all that we must deal with, the casting off to tomorrow for todays troubles, anxiety, fears even of the wrong sort ... Encouragement ... another help when I have fallen back into this trap, this funk is to go back and read some of the great prayers of old. Bounds naturaly, but Fenelon, Pason, Nash ... The Psalms!

I will be praying brother and praying that you will come back here with all the new insights that have been shown you so you can in turn encourage and edify us all.

this is my battle to.
God called me to pray, and since I have been here
in tuscon I have let, good godly things take the place of prayer. I seen in the last week. oh It a fight, I must be willing to fight. To Say no this time is the Lords, and I am sorry you can't have it. Fight, Fight we must fight to pray. It is so hard. It takes everything I got some days.
Emeny dosen;t want us to pray. But we must. I am where you are in alot of ways, I enjoy praying, really it my heart beat, and yet I let the world take it place.

Father I pray for my brother, please we come before you and ask dear Jesus, the name that is above all other name, that is full power and grace. Jesus we pray that you would help our brother trun and keep truning from any sin that is keeping from praying as you have called. Thank you father, for loveing and making him, for seting a path before Him. Jesus we ask you take his heart to night and lift it look, to trust and look to you. restore what has been taken, renew his prayer time. Make his heart pure, and holy before. Thank you for the work you are doing, please keep working tearing away, himslef, so you may come alive in him. Jesus please give him the power to pray. Jesus I pray for the liitle yet big things in life that take our your time with away. Thank for our brothers honest heart, Please speak to him tonight,
Father please let word be living and active in His heart, again we thank you for what you are going to do. amen

Please be uplifted up, even when walk away as I have been doing, he is still there, helping , me back
I thank God for opening my eyes, when I am walking my iwn ways, But I am sure it need to be a daily thing

Thank you so much for sharing it a blessing to my heart

in his love
charlene

I was just reading and I came to this verses

Jesus, Founder and Perfecter of Our Faith

Hebrews 12: 1-6
1Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. 4In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons?
"My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord,
nor be weary when reproved by him.For the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
and chastises every son whom he receives."

Wow it is such good verses
In his love
charlene

this also convicts me. as you were speaking praying over a list of people. I have Lord has call me to pray for and I haven't pray for with a broken heart. I have had times when I pray were my heart is so broken, and other time where is cold.
kneeling- there is something by how we pray.

"This leads me to believe that He prepares and enables us for service like intercessory prayer."

I agree with this 100%, when God wants me to pray, he ables me to do it. Even when I am sick. I think God allowed me to have some my most powerful and heart felt prayers when I was sick,
to show its not about how I feel, but God who moved in my heart

I so blessed by this post, thanks everyone
I may Not be a brother, But I am praying for everyone who posted. Thank you all
In His love
charlene

I was once told by a brother out on the streets one nite while we were witnessing that Jesus always went where He was invited. For the most part I've invited Him everywhere and everyday to go with me and dialogued with Him all day long. There are times and seasons when I withdraw from life for more intense prayer, depending on the occassion or circumstances. Like daily times of bible reading, which most have a hard time disciplining themselves to do, you just have to make up your mind and do it. The old expression is "practice makes perfect". I think the more you include Jesus in on a daily basis the better your prayer life and walk with God will become, than more intense time of focused intercession will be a natural step from this room to the next.

I would say not to be overly anxious about it and guilt ridden, but like an individual building a house that's going to take a year or so to complete, just patiently work at it, always keeping the finished product in the back of your mind. In that way you will cultivate a long range view and won't be discouraged by present failures that I'm sure the enemy of our souls constantly mocks you about with condemnation and failure and as is one of his sanre he likes to create in us a low self esteem build on the foundation of repeated failures. In that way our focus is generally on our selves more than on the present reality of Christ "with us", the Holy Spirit "in us", and the Father "for us". So today just simply invite Jesus to come along with you and watch and see what happens, as a friend who accompanies you don't forget He's there, and that will take practice. God bless Bro. Daryl

Brethren! Some great things here...

There was something that happened in the kneeling--not of me kneeling as a trick of some sort, but of the Lord literally bringing me on my knees. I tried it again last night and it was so hard; it was impossible for me to be as broken before the Lord as before. This leads me to believe that He prepares and enables us for service like intercessory prayer

That is so vital an understanding and think it syncs up very well with what our Brother Daryl noted;

I would say not to be overly anxious about it and guilt ridden, but like an individual building a house that's going to take a year or so to complete, just patiently work at it, always keeping the finished product in the back of your mind. In that way you will cultivate a long range view and won't be discouraged by present failures that I'm sure the enemy of our souls constantly mocks you about with condemnation and failure and as is one of his sanre he likes to create in us a low self esteem build on the foundation of repeated failures. In that way our focus is generally on our selves more than on the present reality of Christ "with us", the Holy Spirit "in us", and the Father "for us". So today just simply invite Jesus to come along with you and watch and see what happens, as a friend who accompanies you don't forget He's there, and that will take practice.

Maybe it is that we are so fond of dictating outcomes or having some certain expectations met and become discouraged when they don't come along the lines we have previously crafted. And as you well stated the enemy of our souls loves to use this against us, guilting us into more and more ... it is a bit ironic to think on it for a bit. What is the point of listening to the powers that be stating how worthless we are! The retort ought to be, precisely why I am here! Maybe if we were just a little more sharp we could find a rejoicing in that. Seems to me a better tactic would be to whisper sweet words in our ears about what super saints we are ... well certainly enough of that to go around ...

2Co 2:11 Lest Satan should get an advantage of us: for we are not ignorant of his devices.

But brother you also touched on something that came back to notice this morning,

In that way our focus is generally on our selves more than on the present reality of Christ "with us", the Holy Spirit "in us", and the Father "for us".

Coming back from the drift again took a great deal of notice about this very thing. That erosion begins to subtly undermine and draw ones self back to ... ones self! When in the midst and in the more dedicated ... continual day to day ... effort of sustained prayer, the self fades into the background in ... order, in 'importance'. Our needs are always going to be pressing us and be those things that the derivatives are drawn up and out of, but even the way the Lord put it is very succient;

Mat 6:31 Therefore take no thought, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed?
Mat 6:32 (For after all these things do the Gentiles seek:) for your heavenly Father knoweth [b]that ye have need of all these things.[/b]

It is not to dismiss them certainly but ...

... seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Mat 6:33

"Added"

So today ...

There you have it, [i]today[/i]. It is enough of it's own trouble to dwell too long on yesterdays failures and tomorrows unknown possibilities and\\or problems. Hardly is it to forget, think that is it's own snare and we would learn nothing if it wasn't still present to draw from but it's the place of occupation it holds our attention level at. It must be able to be put down as fast as it is to be picked up or recalled to mind. The only thing that matters is the Lords will regardless, all our praying has to come to this moment of clarity.

Ah Brethren, it is remarkable the shared experience and my own loquacity is something that I woe about sometimes, rattling on and on here. But so be it, it is all worth it if something is picked up or drawn out of it all. Here is one I marvel at, Richard Baxter;

[i]Even after Mr. Baxter had delivered his very soul through preaching, he still felt that his work was but half done. He knew that the preaching of the Word must be accompanied by the personal and individual touch of a pastor. "He arranged that every family in his parish should come to his house, one by one...then he took each member apart and urgently, tenderly besought him to make an immediate decision for Christ. Seldom did a family leave Baxter's door without tears."

J. C. Ryle esteemed Baxter as one of the most successful pastors to ever live. He writes, "While some ministers were wrangling about the divine right of Episcopacy or Presbytery, or splitting hairs about reprobation and free-will, Baxter was always visiting from house to house and beseeching men for Christ's sake, to be reconciled to God... While others were entangling themselves in politics, and ' burying their dead' amidst the potsherds of the earth, Baxter was living a crucified life and daily preaching the Gospel." Because of Mr. Baxter's great success among his people he soon became a shepherd of shepherds. Addressing his fellow ministers, Baxter writes, "We must feel toward our people as a father toward his children; yea, the most tender love of a mother must not surpass ours. We must even travail in birth, till Christ be formed in them. They should see that we care for no outward thing, neither liberty, nor honor, nor life, in comparison to their salvation... When the people see that you truly love them, they will hear anything from you...Oh therefore, see that you feel a tender love for your people in your hearts, and let them perceive it in your speech and conduct. Let them see that you spend and are spent for their sakes."[/i]

[url=http://www.watchword.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=12&Itemid=23]Richard Baxter[/url]

He has been quoted much in these parts over some time and it amazes me how 'contemporary' he truly is, how he proves out the timelessness of so many things.

[i]His sermons were a combination of cutting and piercing words and a gentle and loving spirit. Baxter consistently spoke like one who had been face to face with Jesus. He drew others to Heaven through his preaching because he had touched Heaven through his praying.[/i]

With so much intake of all these saints it is easy to get the time frames mixed up and it dawned on me again that he lived and breathed and prayed in the mid 1600's. It just struck me differently today.

I am also thing back to our brother Paul's earlier comments about the ebb and flow, better to find that again ...

What you've shared is basically the on-going story of my life. A season of heated prayer and Bible study...then a cool down. Another season of consistent prayer and scripture devotion...and another cool down. Don't beat yourself up, and don't let the impulses of rejection swamp your mind. I'll be honest with you: when we allow ourselves to be swayed from the times of fervent devotion and intimacy with God, it's as if we fight an uphill battle to get back to where we were. The hardest thing is picking up where we left off, because our inadequacies and failures are all too near and vibrant and pulsating. We try to pray and suddenly our heads are assulted with disjointed thoughts and vivid memories of recent defeats.

Somehow I am trying to trick myself here and say two things at the same time. What I mean is the same battle Paul speaks of is ours I would imagine to a great extent and ... here is a verse that sometimes haunts me, make that two;

Eph 4:14 That we henceforth be no more children, tossed to and fro, and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the sleight of men, and cunning craftiness, whereby they lie in wait to deceive;

Jas 1:6 But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.

The word is 'tossed' but it's companion is [i]wavering[/i]. How to defeat ... again for some emphasis;

when we allow ourselves to be swayed from the times of fervent devotion and intimacy with God,

"swayed"

I agree it is not to beat our selves up, but on the other hand it is! Guilt or conviction can be a good thing and I would rather not split hairs over the differences, just that it either can propel us forward to do something about it or we can sit in the ashes and gaze at the belly button over it, mourning our loses. What I did mean earlier about going out into the world without these times of dedicated prayer and for myself that is early hours in the morning and the abject failure is ... Pardon the usual longevity to get out the expression ...

Environment and atmosphere. These things have been much in the thoughts and in my particular circumstances. Recall having quite a bit of conversation with our brother Robert here many moons ago about this as it pertains to the working world. I am still very much up against it. The world is hostile to the things of God and it is not the overt sewer of sin that runs through everything as much as the hostility that is covered in all the [i]good[/i] things that are present. The brutality of it all is in the mixed up or the mixing up of things. It's the being caught up in it all that is the difficulty. The point of fact is that we are a peculiar people, you [i]feel[/i] it because you are not your own and you are in the midst of those who ... are their own. Maybe that is part of it. They do not have to be overtly immoral or anything of that, generally speaking most of those I work with are cordial, polite, earnest, trying to do their jobs. There are the difficult aspects of workplace politics, there is the gossip that is woeful and find I can be ... [i]swayed[/i] there is that word again, caught unaware it is so subtle sometimes. There is the difficulties of being belittled and patronized, passed over, criticized and of course there is just the honest problem of not being better ... organized and a bit more diligent in my own duties. Have come to see precisely why there was a placing of this fool into this construct, it is to primarily develop character and my I am finding out just how short I fall, how long it truly takes to develop this ... There is still this great disconnect between the prayer closet and the opening of that door at work. I haven't changed, it is not a chameleon effort ... but it is [i]their[/i] world, their atmosphere ... By and large God is not [i]there[/i]. He is not in their thoughts or considerations and here, this shaky vessel is carrying within him His Spirit into this atmosphere. This is what I mean by the refueling and times of ... time [i]spent[/i] in His Presence. To go out into this world on empty or relying on the reserves is ... suicidal for me, that is the failure I am speaking of, it is a spiritual failure. We are eternal creatures living and moving through the worlds concepts and environments, their 'cultures', [i]of the world[/i] and us, we being "in" it but not "of it". Maybe a great part of the whole matter is that it is has been trumped, the devil has been given his limited sphere of influence and 'dominion' over it, but it is Gods world, it is His creation and maybe underneath it all I am just a bit ticked off about that! And just as well that the inhabitants have by and large been lulled to sleep by the here and now, this glossy overtone that everything is set off in to the far distance as if it will never arrive, always for another day, eternity ... delayed. Like one giant 'rain out' scheduled for better weather. It is so ... mind-boggling the perception, delayed gratification practically non-existent but eternal matters delayed indefinitely!

It is just a tremendous fight, without words, internally and gutturally. That very quote looms large, worth repeating;

[i]All vital praying makes a drain on a man's vitality. True intercession is a sacrifice, a bleeding sacrifice.[/i]
~ J.H. Jowett

But I think what has started here is of such a tremendous importance. We have had other postings that started out well in this direction, [url=https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=9715&forum=35]How many People struggle with prayer , Prayer 101[/url] and certainly a great deal of redundancy between these two. But we ought to encourage each other more and more especially as the days seem to be growing darker to be much in prayer. To just read of these past saints and the mighty things done by prayer alone .. it goes back to the other thread, "Is prayer the answer?" Oh it is!
Will leave off this ramble with a few more quotes, but pray on saints, pray!

Men may spurn our appeals, reject our message, oppose our arguments, despise our persons, but they are helpless against our prayers.
~ J. Sidlow Baxter

Worship and intercession must go together, the one is impossible without the other. Intercession means that we rouse ourselves up to get the mind of Christ about the one for whom we pray.
~ Oswald Chambers

The greatest thing anyone can do for God and man is pray. It is not the only thing; but it is the chief thing. The great people of the earth today are the people who pray. I do not mean those who talk about prayer; nor those who say they believe in prayer; nor yet those who can explain about prayer; but I mean those people who take time to pray.
~ S.D. Gordon

The prayer power has never been tried to its full capacity...if we want to see might wonders of divine power and grace wrought in the place of weakness, failure and disappointment, let us answer God's standing challenge, "Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and might things which thou knowest not.
~ J. Hudson Taylor

Courtesy of; [url=http://retirementwithapurpose.com/quotes/quotesprayer.html]Great Quotes on PRAYER[/url]

P.S.

[i]Revival[/i] ... Has anyone come to the conclusion that we must have, [i]must[/i] plead for the Lord to come and disturb the atmosphere with [i]His[/i] environment?

History is silent about revivals that did not begin with prayer.
~ Edwin Orr

P.P.S ~

I just want to clarify what I mean by enjoying prayer. I found that while I would be in deep intercession, there was no joy in that, yet there is that thought that what the Spirit is doing is good and therefore I enjoyed the fact that the Spirit was pleased to interceed thru me. It is that utter knowing that He is pleased to use me. It's that relief that He wants me to pray and seek His face.

My brother,

This day again I woke up dry and dead inside.

It took all day to get my equilibrium back.

And yes, this happens periodically...without pattern, but so noticably!

I don't care if I'm unhappy, but I hate my spiritual balance being wrested from me, for in peace and joy is my safety.

And this is a settled feeling, not an emotion, so I get your 'enjoyment' very well.

I hate to say it, but it will happen again.

I do not ever know the cause, I only know that God teaches me with it, using all things to my good, as usual.

But I hate it.

I'll be praying for you to be in perfect peace as you pray, nothing missing, nothing broken, that you may be a tool for the Lord.

Blessings,

Forrest

How are you doing today brother, I ahve been praying for you
God bless
in his love charlene