Am I unforgiving? | SermonIndex

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vasilef Jul 23, 2007

I've been very much concerned about the gossip subject during the last year.
I've been in the position to reprove a brother for his gossip. I know my approach was not the best one... My reaction was lacking somehow in love.

However, I can't consider gossip something else but a sin. On the other hand I realize I'm not at all better than this or any other brother. My main problem is that I love my self, my UGLY self.

Anyway, I wonder if I am too harsh with the brother or if I have an unforgiving spirit.
The situation is like this:
I've told a brother that what he talks with other people about other's weaknesses, it's gossip. He seemed to listen, to be sorry but he still continues to talk negatively about other people.
The last time I talked with him I concluded: God, I leave in your hands whatever he said about me or others, but I cannot trust anymore this brother. It seems that he cannot discern what gossip is.

So, I couldn't cooperate or be open with him anymore. I have a reserve about him. He is a leader in our church , he has many gifts from the Lord and many brothers look at him as to a spiritual brother.
I have many questions and have no answers regarding him.

He will preach that we all have weaknesses. We have to forgive and love each other. I agree.
We have to receive/accept each other the way he is, with his/her weaknesses and pray to the Lord for his change.

This I cannot understand. What can we accept and what cannot accept?
If someone gossip now and then... can I just accept him like that? I prayed for him but I just don't think that we can accept the bad conduct of someone, especially if he is a spiritual leader.
I'm not talking about accepting him as a brother. Yes, he is my brother but how can I trust him, how can I listen and accept his advices, his sermons, his authority?

L

LiveforGod Jul 23, 2007

Am I unforgiving?

No brother/sister, you are not unforgiving. So far what I can see of you is a someone that is not conformed with having a leader that wossips. I would be bodered if I had to listen someody prach when I know that that person is not loyal to obeying God and his Word in everything, even the smallest thing. My friend sin is sin no matter how small it may be. Read Romans 6: 1-2,6-7, 11-17. If the scriptures are right, wich they are, then that brother wich you call brother is not trully a brother in Christ because of the sin he knows to have, but does not try to fix. I wished that all men and women that profess to be saved would really take time to be Holy and less time preaching the word to others when their lives are not in agrrement with the same word they are preaching. Hope this helps :-)

sermonindex Jul 23, 2007

If a dog bites me, shame on him... if he bites me twice, shame on me.

We are to forgive a brother's offense. BUT, the Bible does not command us to trust this person. Hopefully with a reproof they repent (turn their back on their sin) and become trustworthy... and I think we should give everyone that chance, but if they show they are still walking down the same ol' road, then we are to use wisdom and discernment concerning that person.

For instance, if a brother steals from my home I will forgive him... but I'm not going to leave him alone in my house again. At least not for awhile.

Thats just using wisdom. Forgiving someone does not mean we automatically are supposed to trust them again. A souse would be foolish to trust their husband or wife immediately when an affair is uncovered and trust has been violated. The guilty party must earn back that trust.

Sooo... to cut to the chase, I think you're using godly wisdom in not being completely transparent with this person. It would be foolish to do otherwise.

Krispy

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murdog Jul 23, 2007

Vasilef,

"Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother."

"But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established."

"And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the chuch: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican."

Murray

sermonindex Jul 24, 2007

"A man who hardens his neck after much reproof will suddenly be broken beyond remedy. Prov29:1

That is always going to be hard to confront someone. We must always makes sure it is out of love and that we are not just pointing out sin, when we have a blank in our eye. Not sure this leader is the pastor or not, but if he is in some type of leadership, then if this continues I would bring it to the leaders of church according to scripture. If those people knew he was sharing what he knows about there problems they would be crushed. I wouldn't sit under his teaching! Only because he hasn't repented and forsook in the gossip.

We can only give you advice, search Gods word and pray.

V

vasilef Jul 27, 2007

We can only give you advice, search Gods word and pray.

I surely need to search God and pray for wisdom and a godly reaction. Thank you to all.