Hurting Badly Need Testimonies, Prayers and Advice

I have never posted here before, but I am hoping that someone on this board has been redeemed from a similar situation to give me a shred of hope.

I have been trapped in re-occuring sexual sin though pornography and I feel like I have lost my salvation. I have tried to search for scriptures and feel so condemened that I have a hard time even opening my bible. I have lost love for myself and my heart is hurting so badly that I can barely funciton. The effects of this have been complete strife in my marriage. My finances and my relationships with others. There is no joy left or hope in my soul. I have tried deliverance ministries and prayed, but I still feel overwhelmed with lust and being drawn to pornography on the internet.

I want so badly to be saved and have my name in the book of life. I want to have a heart for god, I have become so lost, is there any hope for a person like me. Have I truly lost my salvation.

I am praying...

fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
(Isa 41:10)

In Christ,

Ron

Hello, It is an honor to talk to an humble and as honest person as yourself. My experience is this, I hope it helps you. As a teenager I went very deep into drug addiction and had sex problems too. I got saved when I was 18 and lived right for about 1 1/2 years before backsliding more deeply than ever into drug addiction (mainly heroin, but did a lot of just about everything) and sex problems and criminal activity to support my drug habit. Dave I was in really bad shape for years and years, like you I knew about Jesus but had fallen away. Jesus Christ helped me to completely over come those things. This month marks my twelth year of being drug free. Believe me, I know the feeling of being addicted to something that God hates, and worrying all of the time about going to hell. Been there, done that. -- a lot. God can help you - absolute fact - . I remember a time when I didn't know that, I remember setting and daydreaming and wondering if God could really help me. I still don't really know how he helped me - it was a miracle. I don't have any pat answers or methods for you, just keep seeking him and he will fix you. I love this line from a story I once read: A person says " O God it is hopeless" to which one replies " How can you mention those two things in the same breath? "

God bless you

Praying.

Be encouraged to continue seeking the Lord at all times.

:-)

I am a former deathrow inmate accused of a long list of felonies. Before it came to my execution, someone came along who claimed he was willing to be executed in my place. What was even more outrageous was that he claimed I could be released from jail today if I would only plead guilty without any reservations. When I talked with other inmates they told me that this guys is a complete lunatic and it may be a trap. The other guys warned me under no circumstances to plead guilty and rather try to get a good lawyer.
I thought my case was so hopeless that even the most shrewed lawyer could not bail me out with so much evidence and witnesses against me.
Would you believe it? I took the offer, pleaded guilty on all accounts - and went free the same day! When I arrived at the counter at the prison gate to pick up my belongins, they told me that the guy who was executed in my place had ordered to have my old clothes thrown away and left me a brand new white suit. They also said that he ordered me to join some other former inmates and they would gladly welcome me into their circles.

Of course, this is a made up story :)

If you had lost your salvation, you would not be so broken. Read Psalm 51. Alow God to overwhelm you with His grace. Only by grace you can stand, the most solemn oath never to do this again will not do.

Yes, sin is terrible, but so is unbelief.
God wants much more badly for you to have freedom from this than you can fathom.

Check yourself:
Do you have compassion for other sinners?
Any judgemental attitudes?
Are you in bad company?
Are you aware of any pride in you? Perhaps spiritual pride?
Can you think of anyone who could do with some encouragement in the Lord, than do so.

God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble.

Once you gain victory over this, do not feel better about yourself, lest you fall into legalism.

God bless you!
Philip, a fellow struggler 8-)

I was addicted to pornography at a young age around 13 years old.It was very strange how i was introduced to it .there was a car wreck by my house and after the mess was cleaned up they forgot one thing left in the road a dirty magazine and that's how my addiction started.And now i will tell you how it ended,when i was twenty two years old,a real christian was dealing with my wife about Jesus at our work and she had zero church background i had a good dose of hell fire and brimstone preaching when i was young so when she started in about church one night i was in the middle of recording some new porn for a fellow worker to give to him the following day so she said this guy at work gave me some tapes to listen to will you listen to them with me and i said sure when i get finished with these tapes i will listen to yours. and Jesus came into the middle of my home that night and i had such a Godly fear come over me that moved to Godly sorrow that i not only believed in Jesus but i did the only thing that could save me i repented and took all those movies that night and did what i later learned the people in acts 19 did i burned every one of them. that was 17 years ago I have pastered a church for 14 years now and brother i can give you some advise.Be accountable to someone Godly have your church pray for you expose the devil most people make the mistake of being ashamed of their sin but like the woman that busted in on Jesus at simons house wash his feet with your tears,MAKE A COVENANT WITH GOD CONCERNING YOUR EYES realize it is Jesus you are doing this against,destroy get out remove or do what i did burn the access to your pornography and most important pray to God.I know with every temtation God has made a way of escape.The Holy Spirit IS CONVICTING YOU let Him.I will pray for you and if you hunger and thirst after rightousness you will be filled. hope this helps.God bless

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[size=xx-small]I want so badly to be saved and have my name in the book of life. I want to have a heart for god, I have become so lost, is there any hope for a person like me. Have I truly lost my salvation. [/size]

If you truly wants this from your heart, sir God will bless you with it.
Sir many of us been trap to different kind of sin. What you have mentioned is the biggest issue in martial challenge. My husband and I have gone through very rough path in pretty much the same issue or maybe a lot worst, they all the same any way "A SIN". I have to learn to forgive and that is very hard to do when you got hurt so badly and the trust is broken. But God had bless me with His heart.... The lord reminded me of my promised when we got married for better or for worst etc, etc... I have to stand beside of husband The Lord given me a strength and every thing i need to overcome my hurt and my husband to over come his problem that damage our marriage, The Lord God mend my marriage, my husband, my children and my self. I can safely say i'm able to love and stay with my husband only through God. He is our counsellor, our guide, our mediator, Jesus is our desire, so my husband and i are able to walk hand to continually seek Gods face in our daily life as couple.
Trust the Lord Jesus Christ The One who died on the Cross of calvary, that He is able to deliver you and will make you an overcomer. Remember brother it's not an easy walk, temptetion always around and easy access but keep your eyes on Jesus and fill your mind with His word and praises to His goodness. Don't loose heart God is able and can make you and your family an over comer keep seeking His face, His Word, continually praying through with His Holy Spirit to guide you in your prayer.