I know that this has been posted before, probably more than once. But it's one of those things that it is good to go over once in a while...it has a tendency to put you on your knees.
Brokenness Vs. Pride
When God has given me a broken heart I'm overwhelmed with a sense of my own spiritual need.
When I live a broken Christian life, there is a spirit of compassion about my life because I can forgive much because I know how much I have been forgiven. I always esteem others better than myself.
When I serve God with a broken heart I have a dependent spirit and I recognize my need for others.
When I serve God with a broken life, I've learned the secret of denying myself.
When my heart is broken before God, I have a motivation to serve others. I'm motivated to be faithful before God, and to make others a success.
When my heart is broken before God, I have a deep desire to promote other believers. I have a sense of my own unworthiness. And I'm so thrilled that God would use me in any kind of a ministry or any kind of a fellowship. I'm always eager for others to get the credit. And when my heart is broken, I rejoice, when others are lifted up. And I never defend myself.
When my heart is broken before God, I have a heart attitude that says "I do not deserve to be part of this fellowship. I know that I've got nothing to offer God, except the life of Christ that is flowing through my broken life."
And when I'm broken before God, I'm so humiliated by how much more I have to learn, I'm not concerned about the self-life, and I'm willing to take risks to become vulnerable, and to be close to others, and to open my life to love other people.
And when I serve God with a broken heart, I always take personal responsibility. And I can see where I have done wrong, in any kind of a situation.
And when I'm broken before God I always receive criticism, with a humble and with an open spirit. I'm not concerned, I'm concerned about being real. And what they care about and what matters to those who are broken, is not what others think, but it's what God knows about them. And I'm willing to die to my own reputation.
And when I live a broken Christian life, I'm willing to be open and transparent with others, as God will direct me. And whence I'm broken before God, I don't care who knows or who finds out about me. I am willing to be exposed because I have nothing to lose in my relationship with God.
So, when I serve God with a broken heart, I'm always quick to admit my failures, and I want to seek forgiveness, whenever it is necessary.
When I live a broken Christian life, and I'm under the conviction of God's Spirit, I'm able to acknowledge the specifics about my sin. I'm grieved over the cause of my sin, and I'm grieved over the root of my sin.
And when I'm broken before God, I truly and genuinely repent over my sin, and the evidence in the fact is that I want to forsake that sin.
When I live a broken Christian life, I want to take the initiative to be reconciled when there has been a misunderstanding, or a conflict in any kind of a relationship. I want to race to the cross, I want to see if I can get there first no matter how wrong the other person my have been.
And when I'm broken before God, I compare myself with the holiness of God. I sense the desperate need of the mercy and the grace of God. I always want to walk in the light.
And when I serve God with a broken spirit, I realize that I have a need of a consistent, cleansing of heart and repentance.
And when I'm broken before God, I continually sense my need for a fresh encounter with God the Holy Spirit.
But when there is pride in my life as a Christian, I always focus on the failures of other Christians and other fellowships.
When there is pride in my life, I've got a very self-righteous spirit. I've got a critical spirit. I have a fault finding spirit. And I look at everyone else's faults through the microscope, but I always look at my own faults through the telescope. And I always look down upon the lives of other people.
When there is pride in my life I have an independent and a self-sufficient spirit. I'm protective of my time, I try to protect my reputation and my rights as a Christian, and I focus on the deficiencies of other Christians.
When there is pride in my life I want to be served by other Christians. I've got a desire that... to be successful, I want to advance the self-life.
And when there is the sin of pride in my life, I've got this drive, I want to be appreciated, I want to be recognized, I'm offended and I'm wounded when other Christians are promoted, and I have been overlooked, because of what I have done.
When there is pride in my life, I've got this inner attitude, and this is what I said, that this fellowship is very privileged to have me and my gifts and all I think as what I can do for God.
And when there is pride in my life I'm confident, about how much I've learned of the Scriptures, and how far I have gone in my relationship with God.
And when there is pride in my life, I always keep people at a distance.
When there is pride in my life, I want to blame other people.
When there is pride in my life, I'm unapproachable.
When there is pride in my life, I'm defensive when I'm criticized by other Christians.
And when there is the sin of pride in my life, I'm so concerned to be respectable, I'm concerned about what other people think of me, and I try to protect my image and my reputation.
And when there is pride in my life I find it very difficult to share my spiritual needs.
When there is the sin of pride, I want to be sure that no one else find out that I have sinned. And I try to cover up sin. And I have this instinct to try and not to reveal it.
And when there is pride in my life I always want to make sure that no one else finds out when I have sinned, and I try to cover it up. And I find it very very difficult to say "you know, I'm wrong, will you please forgive me".
When there is pride in my life, I'm concerned about the consequences of my sin, I'm remorseful over my sin, simply because I've been caught, that I have sinned before God and sinned before man.
And when there is pride in my life, I always wait for others to come and ask for forgiveness, when there is a misunderstanding or a conflict, in my relationship with God.
When there is pride in my life I try to compare myself with other Christians, and other believers and other fellowships. And I always think that I'm better than them.
When there is pride in my life I'm blind. I become blind to my own heart condition.
When there is pride in my life I don't think that there is anything in my life that I need to repent of. I don't think that I need revival. Oh but I'm so sure that everyone else needs revival in my relationship with God.
[i]- The preceding was transcribed from a message given by Gerhard Du Toit titled "Principles for the Anointed Prayer Life"