much needed prayer for my heart

Saints,

I have not been on for a while because I have graduated and am not online as frequently as before. I am here petitioning for your prayers.

I'll come straight out and say it, I don't like people very much. I really love the people I have intimate relationships with, customers I have gotten to know over the years and of course my family in Christ.

God has laid it on my heart recently that my judgement and condemnation of others will no longer be tolerated. I need to be concerned for the souls of men and my disposition towards those I don't know needs to change. I need you to pray that God would soften my heart. I need to have a heart that is after his own.

I am irritated pretty much any time I am in public and I observe how foolish people are. I, quite honestly, see people as no smarter than a bunch of animals who can't think for themselves. I am irritated by most people who call themselves Christian because most people worship themselves rather than God.

I know these attitudes are not Biblical or after God's own heart. I've done nothing to deserve the salvation I have and what has been done for me on the cross. I know that God's heart breaks for his children.

Pray for me saints, that God would take away this hate inside of me. May my heart be softened and I would become genuinely concerned for the souls of all men, elect or not (sorry, had to throw that in there).

I will pray for you Ben. I am reading a book right now titled "Radical Gratitude" and it is pretty good. Not a deep theological book just a real life application type.

Praying for you.

Hi,

You are not alone here. You have discovered the phonyness of much in Christendom. You feel an arising indignation and if you do not humble yourself it gets into the flesh. If you do not watch it you can become the worst hypocrite. I have been in meetings of a sort of "discernment club" who unceasingly lament over the state of the church and the nation. There was more death in these meetings than in some shallow soulish worship meetings.

I want to learn to be like Moses who refused God's offer to eliminate his people and turn his descendants into a great nation. He rather wanted to be taken away than to see his apostate people given their due retribution. What a great heart he had!

The Pharisee were once some of the most devoted and God fearing people in Israel. They fell away once they looked away from God and prided themselves in their godliness. How sobering!

God bless you brother.