I don't mean by sin or growing cold. I mean like you see God moving in your life, putting things together for you, and yet you feel like you have to walk a tight rope or you'll wreck everything? Miss something by a day and everything God is building will come tumbling down?
I don't doubt God's ability or willingness; but I have no confidence in my ability to do much other then screw it up.
It's all about grace.
Consider Psalm 103:
11 For as the heavens are high above the earth,
So great is His mercy toward those who fear Him;
12 As far as the east is from the west,
So far has He removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father pities his children,
So the LORD pities those who fear Him.
14 For He knows our frame;
He remembers that we are dust.
And Hebrews 4:
14 Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. 15 For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
He knows we are helpless & weak without Him.
The key is abiding in Him.
John 15:
1 “I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me.
5 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. 8 By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples.
This is a great question... one which I have no answer except yea, I've been there.
Krispy
you feel like you have to walk a tight rope or you'll wreck everything? Miss something by a day and everything God is building will come tumbling down?
So far in life you have managed to stay on the tight rope without falling off? That's an amazing achievement.
I hope you make it all the way to the other end of your rope. You would be the first, and that would be quite a legacy to leave to the world.
If your greatest fear comes to pass and you do ever slip off your rope, you can be comforted knowing that there are many great people down here waiting for you.
Good luck now. (Watch out for shearing winds at high altitudes.) ;-)
MC
Josh,
It is a good thing that you do not have any confidence in your own ability. Jesus Christ lives within you, and He wants to live His life through you.
Self cannot live the Christian life. That is why God crucified us with Christ. So that we would no longer strive to live the Christian life, which is impossilbe to do, but allow Christ to live His life through us.
Mike
It is a good thing that you do not have any confidence in your own ability.
The paradox is that I believe the dilemma with what Josh shared is that while he (we) might not have confidence in ourselves, we never the less feel it's all up to us anyways.
My particular post was a light hearted way of saying that trusting in Christ cannot be so fragile as to imagine we can wreck God's plan for us simply by not walking the line...so to speak. AW Pink addresses our tendency to form an impotent view of God quite forcefully. It might be worth reading his book on the sovereignty of God.
I had a friend once that drove himself crazy because he believed if he was spiritual enough to hear, God would tell him which pair of pants to put on in the morning. Needless to say, he was an anxious fella.
In my experience, once we develop a fear of failure, our only remedy is lot's of failure. It's kind of the way (edit: you make peace with a person you first had trouble with; you get to know them and discover some good, even beneficial aspects to their natures. :) As Josh said, his particular fear is not about sin, but about a belief that God is dependent on our abilities to complete his plan for us. This fear is based on an over estimation of our own role and and underestimation of Gods. Some worry they must place each of their footsteps according to God's precise prescribed dance step pattern for every moment of their lives or they will be off track regarding his perfect will for the remainder of their life.
Again, I believe the bible, and some experience teaches, that God is a little more in control of things then that.
I explain trusting in Christ like this to my own family...
The first time I traveled over seas it was to Sri Lanka. Having had no experience traveling overseas, I spent much time before hand planning my trip. I overpacked, over analyzed, and over worried.
Afterall, I told myself I was traveling thousands of miles!
But the day I boarded the airplane I discovered something kind of obvious. I was never personally responsible to travel thousands of miles to Sri Lanka---my only personal responsible was to travel a few miles to the airport. Once in the plane MY traveling was over, and now the pilot would convey me the other thousands of miles. All I had to do was to abide safely in the plane, which was rather easy since the door was locked. Remarkably, even though I only traveled a few miles to the airport, I somehow ended up in Sri Lanka the next day. The door I had entered in one country, opened up again and I stepped out into another country!:)
So my analogy should be fairly clear. Our job isn't to successfully travel our own unique cosmic trek to heaven, but to travel to Christ. He is a sturdy vessel that knows the way, and doesn't expect his passengers to worry about navigation like explorers with their own compasses and maps.
Blessings,
MC
It's not that I think it's ALL up to me, or us, but even if 1% is up to us and we do it wrong...and it all comes tumbling down. That is what worries me.
Josh,
What do you fear would come tumbling down?
MC
Anything God is trying to build. Career directions, relationships, anything. Again, I have no doubt in God's ability, but I doubt I can get much right.
OK.
How would you know if you wrecked God's plan?
To revisit my plane analogy. The first time I was traveled to Hong Kong I noticed on the GPS screen (provided on the television) that we were not going out over the pacific ocean like I had planned on doing. Instead we were traveling up the coast towards Canada. I was actually becoming a little concerned that we were off course! A few hours later confirmed my worst suspicions, that the plane was going the wrong direction.
Later I learned that I wasn't qualified to determine the best route to our destination across the ocean. I assumed a straight line was the shortest route. Yet, I later learned, that the globe is not a perfect ball, but is slightly squashed top to bottom. Thus the shorter route to Asia is an arched path up and over the flatter circumference of the globe, not a straight path across the fatter equator.
On another trip I remember some incredible teeth rattling turbulence. Once again I assumed that things were out of control. And once again I was informed that the pilots knew about the turbulence and intended on flying through to save time. In fact, I was told that the plane was built to withstand much more turbulence then what we were experiencing that night.
In Christ you will arrive safely my friend.
MC
Do you think God would set you up just to be devastated? Is that part of his plan?
A set of miraculous circumstances open the door for you to get into the vocation and career of your dreams, but you happen to make a phone call at the wrong time, when the boss happens to be in a foul mood and you end up not getting it?
Some Christian single prays for a spouse for years, and through an amazing set of Godincidences, meet the person of their dreams, only to have one, small thing keep them from getting together and they watch in horror as that one marries someone else.
You edited!
Okay, the plane analogy: suppose you were flying to Sri Lanka, and all you have to do is make it to the airport in time... but you don't and miss your flight. Do you see what I'm saying? That's what I'm getting at. You traveled thousands of miles, yet you were responsible for just a fraction. Yet, if you didn't get yours done in time, the rest doesn't happen.
Do you think God would set you up just to be devastated?
You may very well at times feel you are being devastated. Yet, trust the pilot my friend: he sees the whole journey. And don't beat yourself up for daring to trust now.
Psalm 107 tells us that God will indeed touch our careers and businesses..."Others went out on the sea in ships; they were merchants on the mighty waters.They saw the works of the LORD, his wonderful deeds in the deep, For HE SPOKE and stirred up a tempest that lifted high the waves.They mounted up to the heavens and went down to the depths; in their peril their courage melted away. They reeled and staggered like drunken men; they were at their wits' end....Ps 107"
...but for a reason that is consistent with his Fatherly heart for you. The rest of that story from Psalms...
"...they were at their wits' end.Then they cried out to the LORD in their trouble, and he brought them out of their distress.He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed.They were glad when it grew calm, and he guided them to their desired haven."
Christ is our desired haven; nothing less then the safe haven of Christ.
Remember the Rubik's Cube? Well I was only clever enough to orientate one side. I think I was like that in life as well. I had a few sides organized in my life and this was all I wanted. In fact, I thought those sides of my life pleased God as well. Yet, when I gave my life to God he didn't admire it---he started twisting and turning. I was devastated, as you say...why would God see that the sides of my life that were in order become destroyed? Sometime later I understood...he was working on all the sides...including the sides I didn't care about or had dismissed.
Brother, I don't think my little analogy conveys the terrible ordeal that you might be experiencing. Nor am I trying to usurp scripture...only that I am showing there is another way to see these things with hope. Not that hope saves you from pain you are experiencing, but that it saves you from fear that things are all wrong and God is standing afar wringing his hands.
Again, Psalms 66 shows that it is God who directs our circumstances at the highest level...not your participation or the devil's schemes, but God ultimately is ruling this universe we live in.
"For You have tried us, O God; You have refined us as silver is refined. You brought us into the net; You laid an oppressive burden upon our loins. You made men ride over our heads;
We went through fire and through water,
Yet You brought us out into a place of abundance. "
Remember how frantically Jesus's parents were looking for him when he was about 12 years old. When they at last found him they demanded to know where he had been! He replied "Didn't you know I would be in the temple about my Father's business?"
I drew great comfort from that important story when, in great despair I couldn't seem to find Jesus...I didn't realize his spirit was once again in the temple, the weak Christian he has chosen to dwell in, faithfully going about his Father's business.
You feel devastated, but you are not. He is taking you to a place of inward peace and confidence you dared not to hope for in this world. It is a side of your character that you might not have cared for, but he is building it even now.
These are only words I offer you. It is Christ that is the safe haven. Forget me. (edit: and don't let the theologians and the prophets intervene for you.) They would all get in the way if you ask them to. Let Christ become as known by you, as real to you as the problems you face, and you will worship with a grateful heart more gloriously then you could have ever imagined possible. Your problems will not go away perhaps today, but they are only for a season. Yet Christ himself, will never go away or leave you.
MC
but you don't and miss your flight
One thing I've learned is that there is only one airline that's trustworthy, and that's the Gospel. That airline has only one flight: Jesus Christ.
Are you aboard?
Regarding all the other flights we sometimes want to catch, let me tell you one more story. (See as I'm just full of stories tonight:)
One night at an evening service at our church, a pastor preached on the topic of "Standing on the promises you've received from God." For about 45 minutes he challenged and sued the congregation to 'never let go' of their promises? Has God told you he's going to do something for your business, or for your family, or for your health or for for your church? Then stand on it, and don't let go no matter what happens.
Well, it seemed that everyone that night was real energized by such a sermon. There were shouts of amen, and tears at the altar.
At the end I asked permission to speak and shared a missionary story I had recently read. It told of an underground pastor that was brought in for questioning by some communist police during the 1950's. At first they threatened him by telling him they would take away all of his possessions. He told them, "To do that you will need a very tall ladder, because everything of value to me is in heaven." Then they told him they would kill him. He replied "then you would only be sending me to that place." In frustration they told him, that if he didn't stop preaching the gospel they would place him in a cement cell with no windows and he would be utterly cut off from all his friends for the rest of his life. To that he replied " Ah, now that you cannot do, for I have a friend that walks through walls."
My point that night is that in this life you will have many troubles. Don't think you won't. But there is no depression, no pain, no fear, no walls that we can imagine, that Jesus Christ can't walk right through and comfort you himself.
You might have indeed blown it. You might have made your bed and now have to lie in it as the saying goes. You may be questioning your motives, retracing your steps, wishing that you could do it all over again. This retracing might have a little instructional value, but ultimately don't look for peace or security in such labor. In the end, the only real peace you will find is not the power to know whether you should zig or whether you should zag. The only real question that leads to peace is are you in Christ Jesus?
Consider Psalm 139:8
"If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there."
And if you cannot take comfort from the surety of that, then surely you can take away confidence from Paul in 2 Corinthinas 1..."what I purpose, do I purpose according to the flesh, so that with me there will be yes, yes and no, no at the same time?" Sound familiar Josh? I've known the the agony of trying to hold onto Christ with a limited liability warranty....Yet Paul teaches according to revelation, not according to reason when he goers on to say " But as God is faithful, our word to you is not yes and no. For the Son of God, Christ Jesus, who was preached among you by us—by me and Silvanus and Timothy—was not yes and no, but is YES in Him.
For as many as are the promises of God, IN HIM they are YES; therefore also through Him is our Amen to the glory of God through us. Now HE WHO ESTABLISHES us with you IN CHRIST and anointed us IS GOD, who ALSO SEALED US and gave us the Spirit in our hearts AS A PLEDGE."
What I read there is that if I am abiding in Christ (the airplane) I am not going to blow any of God's promises. Not that it says I have the power to keep God's promises for him...it only says that in Christ they are sealed. Whatever is of importance to God is sealed. That is the flight you need to be on brother.
Are you in Christ? If so, there may be some terrible turbulence for a season, and some vexing detours, but rest assured, and again I say, rest quite assured deep in your heart and mind...you are in the safe place.
Blessings,
MC
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