Can I Get A Witness??

Mr. Bill is a witness, he just witnessed to a neighbor last night during a big fire in the field by Mr. Bill's house. I wonder if the fire being closer to his home got him to pay more attention to Mr. Bill. :-)

Hi

I will share what Father has been doing in my life but please understand this is difficult for me and something I have been praying about for awhile. I will admit that until this morning I would not have had the strength to write this post but in Him I am no longer afraid.
For the past ten years I have struggled with sin in my life. IT has to do with my weight. At one time I was very heavy, over 250 pounds, and then there were times where I was just over 100 pounds. I binge eat, and then I make myself sick as a way of controlling my weight. At first I did not even see this behavior as sin, it wasn't until just over the past few weeks that Father opened my eyes to see just how selfish my heart was in this area. I was making myself sick all for the sake of how I looked. Vanity or at least worrying about how I looked, not looking young enough/good enough was also a huge part of it. Obsessing about food/gluttony and then the inevitable guilt of how I had over eaten was always there, so after I ate I would sneak off to the bathroom and make myself sick. For along time it was like that, months were I would eat what ever and then periods of daily making myself sick. It was a cycle that I had begun to see as a normal way of life. Not so long ago someone posted a short video, Isn't it Enough? (Paul Washer's Secret) It really touched my heart and for a long while every time I would over eat or make myself sick a vision of Jesus on the cross kept feeling my mind and heart... “Am I not enough for you.” I would hear His voice whisper to me. It was during this time I really began looking at my heart and the things happening in my life. For the first time I saw my behavior as sin. I realized that the real issue or the root of the sin I was struggling with was a lack of trust and faith in Him. I wanted to be in control of things in my life. I was always striving to be something I couldn't be and failing miserably at it. Sadly I was oblivious to how my actions might be hurting others and most importantly, how they must have hurt the Lord!
One evening as I was praying Father opened my eyes to His truth, He showed me that I can trust Him. He is faithful and He will carry me through, I just need to submit my life to Him. He will never fail me. I saw how clearly that what I was doing was sin, I was not a victim of the worlds view of me. Yes the world tells you that if your not young, skinny, and trendy then you really have no worth, but it struck me what was I, a professing child of the King doing listening to the world anyway. I would never find what I was longing for in the world. I could only ever find what I need in Jesus. Since then I stopped feeling sorry for myself, what I was doing, my behavior, was my choice and it was sinful for me to be involved with gluttony and purging, no matter what happened around me it was and is my responsibility, I had to own up to that. Daily I am given a choice of how I am going to walk my life, it will either be in Him or in self. I knew it was time to start walking in Him! When I began thinking about how so many people around the world had nothing to eat and here I was eating and then purposefully doing what I was I felt very convicted. Oh how I had trampled on His blessings and His provision, it really broke my heart. I realized to that so much of my thoughts were on self and not on Him. My focus was all about me and not others as it should be... After that I cried out to Father and sought His forgiveness, and now I am bringing it into the light so it will no longer have any hold over me. I know now that I can eat food and not let it rule me any longer as long as my focus is on Him. He is my strength, there is so much in life that is just to much for me to deal with but thanks be to God because I don't have to. He is God and I only need to look to Him.
I am praying daily now to see the sin in my life the way Father does. I pray for the strength not to excuse my sin but instead bring it into the light were it has no victory and to lay it down at the cross. I see food from a different perspective now, His perspective. He has shown me His heart and changed mine so that I now know food is there to nourish my body and to strengthen me to be about His kingdom and to full fill what His will for me is. In the end the most important thing I have learned and grown to understand it all of this is that Jesus is enough...He is so much more then enough!!!

sorry if this went to long...
God Bless
MaryJane

Mary, that brought tears to my eyes, I can relate. My wife has had the same issues for probably longer than 10 years, and I just Friday bought her a treadmill and she liked it better than the new car.
You are not in the boat alone probably 80% of America is or has been in this boat, thank God you and my wife are determined to get out of the boat.
God Bless
Mr. Bill

MaryJane,

Thank you for sharing from your heart. I know that is not easy, especially when it is so new. I have been where you are now (struggling with an eating disorder and a false body image). I used to be a personal fitness trainer as well, which just made it harder because i thought I had an 'image' to portray. I really encourage you to read [url=http://www.xanga.com/NewSurrender/689480457/---true-beauty---true-worth---/]True Beauty-True Worth[/url] This is a summary of a talk I gave recently at a MOPS meeting. You can also visit my older website (MoreofHim.net)to read more about my story.

Eating disorders and false body images are something the Lord can totally redeem us from- but it's not always easy. I still have to fight against it sometimes. It is so great to hear you are on your journey to freedom!

In Him, Chanin

HI Chanin

Thanks so much for sharing your testimony with me. I understand what you said about fighting against it sometimes. There are days that are harder then others. I know that at times I find myself almost out of habit heading toward the bathroom after I have eaten dinner and then stopping myself and realizing that I am not that person anymore. Its so strange to some to think that making one self sick can become as routine as say putting on your shoes in the morning and yet it some ways it does get like that. Does that make sense? Father is so faithful though and He is always with me, now instead of trusting in myself(which will always lead to failure) I trust in Him! He is now my strength as I walk out each day. His love and grace never fails and I am so thankful for that.

MR. Bill: I think your wife is so lucky to have a husband who loves and supports her too. I will keep her in my prayers.

Krispy: Thanks for opening up this thread it has really helped a lot to be able to share this with others and to hear from those that have been there.

God Bless
Maryjane

Sister MaryJane,

One of the sweetest things about this site is that we get to know each other by getting glimpses of each other's hearts, and that is the way God sees us..."for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." 1Sam16:7b

Our real mirror is the Word of God. When I look into it, I see my sin, but in the brightness of the glory of it, I see His grace and hope. When I confess my sin and repent of it, he doesn't just give me a "spit shine," He cleanses me through and through with the precious blood of His Son.

Faith to faith, glory to glory.

Within you is eternal life through Jesus Christ--all of His promises, all of His power, all of His love--His life in you! You can't be more beautiful than that!!

I am praying for your continued victory.

KrispyKrittr wrote:

It happened on Sunday, January 17 around 7:30am. 2 1/2 weeks ago. It wasnt associated with tingles or goosebumps. He simply changed my heart. Regenerated it... whatever. But I am not the same person.

It's not that I had some great sin in my life, or anything like that. I just fell to my knees and cried out to God "I can not do this on my own! I need you to do it thru me! I'm so tired... I can't go on like this!"[/i]

I appreciate your tenacious spirit of keeping this topic alive. It is what it is all about.

I can relate to not being 'the same person', but as yours seem to come in all at once, mine was gradual.

To back way up, in 75 I went from being dead to God to alive to Him. For 10-15 years, there was a struggle of the two natures. For another 10 years I feel I came out on top of that struggle as I became better and better at chosing good over evil. But even that was short of what I knew was possible with God.

About 5 years ago, I decided to start over. I began to seek God simply for the purpose of finding Him. The result of that process has been a change in my nature. It happened gradually and is still happening. Relatively speaking, I no longer struggle with sin. The best way I have come to put it is that as I have now become full of God, it has despelled sin as I was never able to do on my own.

In relation to good, better and best, it was good that I became alive to God and began my struggle against sin. It was better that I actually gained tremendously in that struggle. It is best that God has changed me that I now no longer struggle.

I really love it when I see God working thoroughly in an area that He wants us to see. Last nights bible study was a continuation of Sundays sermon from Revelation 12 where they overcame by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony. We dug into how our confession and witness affects our walk Sunday, but went deeper last night into how our words speak either life or death and bear the fruit of that choice. This is why our confession is so important. We are setting as a pillar and marker of remembrance of God's faithfulness as well as encouraging others. The interesting part to me was the converse side. As satan is trying to get people to "confess" his work, it gives him power also. The instance is people coming out of the closet and confessing "I am a homosexual". We release either life or death by our confession, and I want to be sure that I am constantly giving my Father the freedom to move in my life by praising, and confessing His goodness, faithfulness, mercy, and grace. I will enter His gates with thanksgiving and courts with praise. God is indeed preparing His saints to walk with Him and be found abiding only in Him. Thanks to all who testify to God's power and goodness, here and in your world. God Bless Barry

Can you explain a little more- i believe it- but going away from it- used to be faithful -still trying my best-but feel am falling away.

Yes, God is good.God is holy. At times i do not understand why he reamins sient for certain areas when we pray according to His will -abide in Him to the best of our ability and His words abide in us. We can never say we are perfect and never fail- but praise the lord that the blood of jesus is powerful to cleanse us and build us. God is good.God is love.

BVO-do explain about confession- your post helped me to continue in what the lord has been teaching me.here it is

Just wanted to share that God is helping me too to walk in a new way-.To trust God even when it looks like He cannot change people or situations.it looks like i am on this side of the fence- then on the fence- then on the other side ofthe fence- back again - doubting again- faith for some time- then sinking down in hopelessness...BY THE GRACE OF GOD THIS FREQUENCY IS DECREASING- still struggling- but realizing that it IS FAITH THAT BRINGS VICTORY.i can walk on this water like Peter, but must focus on Jesus not the storm around.CONFESS GOD'S WORD- CONFESS THAT JESUS IS LORD- CONFESS THAT GOD IS NOT MAN THAT HE SHOULD LIE AND WILL KEEP HIS PROMISE. JESUS IS STILL THE SAME.The walk on the narrow path is difficult, but the blessing and favor of the Lord will come.
I am realizing not to be like Eve when satan told her "did God say"- instead in times of doubt say "lord you said in your word- You are almighty-You are the God who made this ever expanding universe- you are powerful- you are holy- You are GOd-impossible is not in your vocabulary- you care even though it does not look like you do..."This praise is like the suns light that rises to move away the fog of doubt and unbelief- This praise is like a door that opens doors of hope and blessings- This praise is like an anchor that helps me to continue to stay close to jesus.This praise foils evil plans and lets God to step in and make the crooked places straight.Our God reigns.
Be it for a job- for favor for all blessing it will come to pass. Isaac sowed in the time of famine and reaped a 100 fold. In this age when economy - job availability ...and other details are in jeopardy OUR GOD IS ABLE-