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The River of Life

sermonindex Jun 25, 2010

THE RIVER OF LIFE

Genesis 37:11,18,20 (ASV)
11 And his brethren envied him; but his father kept the saying in mind.
18 And they saw him afar off, and before he came near unto them, they conspired against him to slay him.
20 Come now therefore, and let us slay him, and cast him into one of the pits, and we will say, And evil beast hath devoured him: and we shall see what will become of his dreams.

How many of us know that water is the very source of life? God is often times referred to as water, the life that He gives us is supernatural water. When we receive this water then we never thirst again. There is river that flows from the Holy throne of God. It is the source of all life and it is in this source we must flow.

This flow must come from the very center of who we are, the most secret parts of us, the secret garden of our hearts, a place that is often times hidden away by the ravages of life. While this is the true source of life, the place that Jesus must reign over, too often is it guarded. Jesus has gone to enormous lengths to free us to be exactly who He wants us to be, yet so many will miss out because the very core of who they are remains veiled and guarded.

Each one of us has been given a portion of the river of life. It is to be found at the very center of our hearts. When we discover Jesus, we discover the power to unlock the source of life itself, the river of life. Jesus is the key to unlocking this river and it must begin to flow from the heart of man.

When I was seven years old, my mother gave her heart to Jesus, completely transforming her. My alcoholic father went crazy, I believe he knew instinctively that he was no longer in control of my mother, and that she was in love with another man, albeit Jesus. Our family was plunged into a world of violence and verbal abuse. Since I loved to listen to my mother talk about Jesus and was really drawn to the Lord, I incurred the wrath of my father. I only ever heard my father call me “idiot,” or “hey you.” He would often accuse me of being gay because I would not respond to his taunts or slaps.

He would try to get me to hit him, but I would not. Yet, in the process, my heart was being crushed, he had , in effect, threw me into a pit. In order to deal with the rejection and the pain I eventually sold myself into slavery. My “brothers,” were “hurt,” rejection,” pain,” “bitterness,” and “anger.” My jailers were sex and drugs and alcohol. And the very center of it all, the very core of my heart, the place where only my father had reached into and crushed, Satan had planted a flag, it was a flag of victory and it signified that this was his territory. He had claimed it and occupied it.

Before Jesus came, God’s presence was to be found in what was called “The Holy of Holies.” Behind the curtain, behind the veil, the actual presence of the Lord was to be found. No man or woman could come into this presence and live. The sin in our lives would render us destroyed in the presence of perfection, akin to matter and anti-matter, the two cannot exist side by side.

So why was God the Father behind the veil? Gods heart was broken by the sin of His creation. His longing to be reconciled to His children was a pain that would be impossible to understand. If we are even to get a glimpse of how much pain the Father felt because He loved us so much we have to look to Calvary and the sacrifice of His only begotten Son. At the very height of the agony of Calvary, when Jesus cries out to His Father “Father, why has thou forsaken me?” the Fathers heart is broken in pain, the ultimate sacrifice has been accomplished, there is now nothing that can separate us from the river of life.

The veil, the curtain in the temple was “torn,” and our Fathers heart was torn. And in the pain of sacrifice and agony and love, a love we cannot possibly understand for our minds are too small, the presence of the Lord was released into the world from the very heart of His presence, no longer veiled behind the curtain of separation, but released to flow into a world darkened by separation, by a decision to shut God of by disobedience and sin.

If we are to be a light unto the world then we too must rip the veil of our heart and expose the very core of who we are to the light of the Lord Jesus. Only then can we allow our portion of the river to flow and to begin to heal everything that it touches, starting with ourselves and then reaching out to our families, friends and ultimately the world. This is a challenge that will strike fear into the hearts of many men , for only you know the very intimate source of your pain, but you probably cannot even imagine how many areas of your life it has effected.

A couple of years ago my mother and father came to visit us from Scotland. Now my father came to Christ 19 years ago. I came to Christ 16 years ago. I forgave my father, but there was never any words spoken about it. I do not believe I ever really had a real meaningful conversation with my dad. I still longed for affirmation from him, but it never came. I found my security and worth in Christ Jesus and He has dramatically turned my life around. Yet, in the back of my mind, in the deepest recesses, I guess I still longed to hear some words of affirmation from him.

Now , all these years later, my father, my former tormentor , came to the land that I now lived in, a land where the Lord had prospered me in every way. He was very much older and because of his age and illness, very much a shadow of the man who had caused so much fear and trembling all those years ago. If it were in my heart, I could have belittled this man, but,
“ as for you ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.

One night, after church, I prayed for a young man for a certain issue in his life. I told him that he had to see his situation as a battle and that he had to fight his way through his enemies to gain victory. As I drove home that night, the Lord turned that prayer on me. He showed me that the enemy had planted a flag, right in the center of my heart, signifying that this was his territory. The Lord wanted me to go to battle, break through the lines and remove that flag. He gave me the exact words to say.

I was to go home, find my father in the basement, turn the television of, look him straight in the eye, and tell him I was going to say something and I did not want him to interrupt. Then I was to say to him, “Dad, as far as I am concerned, there s no past between us, only now and the future and I love you so much.”

Now that may sound simple to many of you, yet, this was one of the hardest things that I had ever contemplated. I instinctively said in my mind “that’s not possible,” and out of my mouth came this “It is possible.” I had no idea where the words came from, but it was a rebuke from the Lord from my own mouth. As I drove home, I was involved in a tremendous battle.

Fears and insecurities, fear of rejection , all surrounded my mind. How could I go home and be truly vulnerable to the very man who had crushed me all those many years before? To say that I was terrified would not be an understatement. Yet the Lord urged me on and I knew that if I could be obedient that this would truly be a turning point in my life, the Lord wanted to be the Lord of every part of me, especially the deepest part of me.

I got home, went straight to the basement, trembling, turned the television of and told my dad that I had something to say and I did not want him to interrupt. I told him that as far as I was concerned, there was no past between us, only the present and the future and that I loved him so much. I wept, a forty year old man wept and hugged his dad like a child, my dad wept too and took me in his arms and just held me. Oh how I had longed for this as a child, and here was the Lord putting the pieces back together all these years later because I trusted the small still voice.

If there is someone in your life who has hurt you, or disappointed you, if there is a root then the word tells us to “peruse peace,” and not to “fall short of the grace of God.” This root will “cause trouble,” and “defile you.” Open up your heart to Him. Ask Him to try you and see if their is anything that is causing you to fall short of the grace of God. The root of your trouble may be very legitimate, you may have been wronged and wounded. Do not wait on the other person.

Maybe its a brother or a sister, Mother of Father, perhaps a grown child. Maybe its been years since you have spoken and the pain has been covered up by distance and time. The time is now to break the power of past hurts, and until it broken, it has the power to control you and cause you pain and cause you to fall short of Gods grace.

Make the call, reach out to that person. I understand the potential is there for great pain, for more suffering, but I also know that the power of God is at work when we trust in Him and follow His word.

We are more than conquerors in Christ Jesus. Even if ten thousand come against us, we will slay them all by the power and victory of Christ Jesus. That night I spoke to my father, I slew the enemies that had came against me, I reached the center of my heart and I took the enemies flag, uprooted it, broke it in two over my knee and threw it to the ground. I had, by the power of the Spirit, reclaimed this territory for the glory of God. May His marvelous name be praised.

I am not sure what it is that may lie at the center of your heart, but I know that the Lord desires to rule and reign over all of you, nothing held back that He may put into operation, the full victory of Calvary. When He cried out “It is finished,” then down came the veil, and out poured the presence of God Himself into this world, the river of life that flows and heals everything that it touches.

Open up your heart today, let the Lord lead you in healing the most secret parts of your heart and today life will flow through you, waters of life that will quench your deepest thirst and touch all that is in your life.

Brothers and sisters, take back that which is yours, break the power of the enemy in your life. And your weapon? ………………………….LOVE…….Jesus is LOVE!!!!

G
Goldminer Jun 25, 2010

Well Dearest Appolus you have made me cry today, and I thank you for it. Oh for more testimonies like this one. If we could just share our hearts in this way deliverence would come to many.

Rev 12:11 And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; and they loved not their lives unto the death.

This testimony brings to my mind a place where I was bound even after 8 years of being aprehended by my Savior.

I had this horrible rage and jealousy with regards to my husband. Every time he would go anywhere I would grill him and rake him over the coals to find out exactly where he was, what he did, and more importantly, who he talked to. Were there any women there? etc. I never gave the man a moments peace. And he was a good husband and father, it was all in my head or really my heart, just as you said.

I would repent, ask God for forgiveness, resolve never to do it again, but it was repeated constantly. I doublt you could image just how mean I was.

Well one day after a particularly ugly send off to my husband as he went on a little fishing trip, I fell on the floor and wept until I thought I would die. I kept asking God why I had no control over my reactions, and the word came. "You don't trust Me."

He then began to show me how growing up there was no stability in my life, sometime I was in a children's home, or pushed off with relatives. Drinking was a big part of my families life too, and immoral lifestyles all added to the disfunction that left me insecure. Even though people thought I was pretty, I always felt ugly, and never had any friends because I wasn't long enough in one place to make any. I had "0" self esteem. I couldn't believe anyone would stay with me, really love me, and thought that everyone would eventually leave me. God called all this to my rememberance.

He then spoke to me a word that has totally set me free. "Even if your husband leaves you, I never will." It was like a light went on in my spirit. I saw that though mother and father forsake you, He never would. I could trust Him to be my everything and all I needed. The truth of why I was reacting this way brought healing and deliverence to my bound heart. I have never been the same.

I am still married to the same great man, that needs Jesus, so pray my friend, but we have been married 39 years now and I haven't grilled him in years. We have peace in our home because I trust in my Almighty Savior for everything that concerns me. Even when pretty women come around I am free, free, free. Hallelujah.

Truly the things that shape us in our childhood can become road blocks to our freedom in Christ. Victory can only come when the spotlight of truth is shone into that painfull area, allowing God to heal it. I can say that the joy that flooded my soul on being set free from my bondage is incredible. I count that day as a epoch in my life. I am so greatful for it. Peace in the inner man is of great value.

Fear has torment. I was afraid of being left because everyone in my childhood left me in different degrees. There was no stability, no sureness. I could't count on anything, accept emotional pain. But Jesus.......

Even though the years have made pudgy, and age has left me with no real outward beauty, I can look in the mirror and say I like what I see, I like the person He has made me to be, even though He is still working on me :0). I am not ugly to myself anymore because He values me and loves me. I thought myself worthless, but that was a lie of the enemy propagated by my past, but now I am free indeed. I no longer have to focus on myself, but on my redeemer and His plan for my life. Glory to God. What does the world have to offer, just more death, but I know the joy that comes in the morning.

Eph 1:6 To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.

Jhn 14:27 Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.


Again, thanks for sharing your touching testimony Appolus. I was really blessed by it. This is such a wonderful piece of the mosaic of your life. I see why you have the love and depth in your writing. Refiners fires have had their work in you and it leaves you with blessings for others. Thanks. All glory to God. Only He can take what is esteemed as worthless and make jewels out of it. Oh what a awesome God we serve.

sermonindex Jun 25, 2010

Well dear sister, what can I say, we have made each other cry today. Oh how I recognize the same enemy that you overcame. Oh how I rejoice in the victory that you wrought in Jesus. What a powerful testimony to a victorious Jesus.

" I fell on the floor and wept until I thought I would die. I kept asking God why I had no control over my reactions, and the word came. "You don't trust Me."

Powerful, sister, powerful.

"Truly the things that shape us in our childhood can become road blocks to our freedom in Christ. Victory can only come when the spotlight of truth is shone into that painfull area, allowing God to heal it. I can say that the joy that flooded my soul on being set free from my bondage is incredible. I count that day as a epoch in my life. I am so greatful for it. Peace in the inner man is of great value."

I tell you what you should do sister. Take out the references to me and post this testimony under its own title. Many woman would be touched by this powerful testimony. God bless you and my spirit soars to think of your deliverence from this horrendous bondage. Yes sister, its all about freedom. He who the Son sets free is free indeed, its the glorious liberty of Calvary, reckoned in a life. He did not die for you because you were without value, He died for you for love and if the Lord loves you, then thathas eternal value. For all those who think of themselves as worthless, please consider the cost of Calvary and know that He died to make you a child of the living God..........brother Frank

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