The Art of Friendship (and a thank you)

Right now is a rough and bumpy road for me but on this bumpy road I have learned some things the Lord has been teaching me. One thing I have sought to do is to be a friend to my wife which for some reason is difficult because it required me to really step back and examine my heart. I had to really look at my wife and ask what does it mean to be a friend.

I remember growing up my mom always told me to make friends you got to be a friend, great advise, golden even but my biggest problem was What is a friend and how do you become one? I found that in Christ it should naturally breed friendship because being a friend means to put your own interests aside and taking on your friend's interest into mind.

With my wife I have learned each day it requires me to lay down my life for her and forget about my comfort and selfishness for the sake of friendship. The more I become and do things I feel a friend should do the less and less insecure I am in my relationship with my wife. The more patiences I show the more God brings His peace to my heart.

I also found that being a friend also required humility and at times being wronged by a friend. Meaning we are all humans and we must all realize our friends no matter how good intentioned they are, are bound to make a mistake or sin that may hurt us, BUT we must suck up our hurt pride and take the path of humility and show our friend kindness and forgiveness.

Being a friend is at times tough but here lately I have been so excited about being my wife's friend. I have taken it as a personal challenge to do something nice for my wife everyday for the rest of my days to show her I really truly care. Today's task? I wrote her a thank you with 7 other thank you notes on the inside, challenging her to hand out the smaller thank you notes to those that she wants to thank but never does. I did that in hopes to be a blessing to my wife because as most of you know doing a good deed and thanking a friend is very rewarding. :)

I end this post with this, THANK YOU SERMON INDEX Brothers and Sisters, for your prayers, your concerns, your encouragement, your advise, your listening ears, and Your Godly friendship. I truly love you all and thank you for showing me Godly examples of friendship each day.

God Bless,
Matthew

Excellent, Matthew!

Another thing a friend does is listen to the heart of what it being said. Males have a problem seeing beyond the words actually spoken, hence all the jokes about men not understanding women.

To bridge this gap means you will have to probe to get her to explain. Some may not want to because of fear of being mocked. Do not ever do that. It may be absurd to a male what she is thinking, but to her it is real. If it is absurd, gently show her why. But then you may be the one who is absurd - it cuts both ways. (I am reminded about the time when we got a call at our house that a destructive tornado is headed our way. I immediately got in the car, drove to the greenhouses and demanded my husband get in because a tornado is headed our way - we are going to leave the area. He knew nothing about it but submitted to my panic. Yes, there indeed was one that went by 3/4 mile east of us - one that eventually hit Tuscaloosa. He'll never forget this incident and neither will I.) Yes, a friend listens well, with the heart and mind both engaged.

I think you will make it, Matthew. God bless...

Brother Mathew,

What you call friendship here is actually a divine love that Jesus showed to us. Ephesians 5-25 says we need to show the same love to our wives as well. God is teaching me this and I am happy you are in the same path as mine.

Just like how Christ is responsible for Sanctification of Church, we husbands are also responsible for our wives sanctification. But it needs to be done with Love and not with legalism. Christ sanctifies me by being patient with me even though I have dishonored him so many times. The same way I need to be patient with my wife as well.
It is amazing how our unmarried Jesus shows us (married men) how to love our wives.