I'm not that bad...

How do you share with a person who does not think they are that bad a person? How do you help them to see and understand that even if they never get involved with drugs, alcohol, lustful living, hate another, or embrace the fallen ways of this world they are still a sinner and JESUS must be the priority of their life. No one is free from sin, no matter how they were raised, even the most behaved children still hold on to and must deal with sin that is in their hearts. So how do you share with a young person who by worldly standards is a "good kid". How does one share with them the pressing need they do have in their life just as any other sinner does for JESUS to be LORD of their life?

God bless
mj

What makes a situation like this so hard is that they are correct. They may well be fine, upstanding, loving, community examples that exemplify lives of integrity and sacrifice for others. They often look at the "church" and think, "Well... I live a much more moral and ethical life than the vast majority of those who claim to be Christians... they obviously don't have anything available to help them that I don't".

What I have found helpful in reaching people in that situation is to not focus on "how bad they are". Instead turn the focus the way of Romans.

It is not that they are "so bad". The issue is that no matter how upstanding an individual is.. NO ONE IS GOOD ENOUGH. ALL have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God Romans tells us.

So.. if you can approach it from the angle that they are fine decent folks but regardless, we have all sinned at some point. They (we all) have at some time lied, coveted, stolen, hated, deceived, or done something on some level that was in violation of the law. So.. no matter how good we are we all stand in need of a Savior because no matter how good our best is it isn't good enough. We must have a Savior to make us complete in Him and pay for our sins.. regardless of how great or small those sins might be.

That for me has been key in reaching folks of that type. It isn't that they are so terrible... it is that no matter how "good" they are.. none of us is good enough to meet His standard and we all have fallen short and must have a Savior.

Hope that helps.

Blessings!

Many good posts. We all have a little piece of the "puzzle". Another issue is that we are all separated from God through sin and the only way to repair the breach and restore fellowship, receive forgiveness and inherit eternal life is through Jesus Christ. "There is no other name under heaven by which we must be saved than Jesus Christ."

I don't try to show people how "bad" they are, only the Holy Spirit can do that. Jesus exposed the Pharisees for how hypocritical they were and He showed love and forgiveness to the lost.

Back then, people could choose between the religionists of their day and Jesus and many chose Jesus. He was a stark contrast to the lack of love and forgiveness that the religionists showed.

Pilgrim

Hi! MaryJane

Wow! I just had a wonderful experience because of you.
Before I read this particular Thread, I had just finished reading an earlier Post titled, "I want to see!".
That Thread was astonishing! It very much warmed my heart to read it.
And then I arrive at this Thread, "I'm not that bad".
After reading it, I wanted to should aloud, "Tell them that they're blind!".
"Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him".

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I'm not that bad...
by MaryJane on 2012/6/11 7:11:32
How do you share with a person who does not think they are that bad a person?
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I was one of those "good kids", MaryJane. It was hard (until as only GOD could do) until my eyes were opened to the fact that even our righteousness is as filthy rags. And there may be even that rare person who would have to say they never told a lie if you present the ten commandments. But for me the key was, "Do I love the Lord with my WHOLE HEART, soul, mind and strength"?? I don't think anyone could say they do that.

Even after the Lord saved me and I had been walking with Him for some years, I still struggled with the concept. He gave me a VERY GRAPHIC illustration for which I am ever grateful. I apologize that it is gross so the weak of stomach should stop reading here. I only share it b/c it drove the point home to me.

Some 12 years ago we had moved into our current home. We did not know that our septic tank was full and it backed up into our basement. I had never dealt with anything like this before, but the utility room which was fairly large was covered with sewage. We had people come to sanitize, but until then it was my job to get the bulk of it cleaned up. I cannot tell you how sickening this was, but as I rinsed out sponge after sponge, amidst tears, God showed me that the sponge was what my heart was like. The water was of course very dirty. Many rinses later, the water became clearer, but NEVER TOTALLY CLEAR.....I could not get the sponge clean. I suppose if I had stayed there all day, maybe the water would have turned clean, but I'm sure it would have never passed the microscopic test in a lab of being pure and untainted. It was a picture of my heart, and I am EVER GRATEFUL to the Lord for giving me the illustration. (We have a new basement now :) )

Still....no matter what illustration you use, until God makes the blind to see, the young person you mention will not be able to see. I well know from experience with my prodigals....

Mary Jane wrote //How do you share with a person who does not think they are that bad a person? How do you help them to see and understand that even if they never get involved with drugs, alcohol, lustful living, hate another, or embrace the fallen ways of this world they are still a sinner and JESUS must be the priority of their life.//

How Did Nathan convince David of How Bad He was??

And How Did Paul Bring all of us to our knees in the Book of Romans?? It was not by telling us that our substance is sin. No,It was by proving to us that all men have an understanding of what is right a (conscience) and they fail there own Judgment, and because of this guilt enters in and death form innocence occurs.

Romans ch 1 We as good moral church people all agree with Paul, He is speaking about the wrath Of God coming on the Athiest and Homosexuals,we as good church goers are all Amening his sermon,Saying Yes Preach it Paul Preach it.
He goes on V 29 Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity; whisperers,
30 Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,
31 Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implacable, unmerciful:
32 Who knowing the judgment of God, that they which commit such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.
We are still saying Yes keep preaching it Paul! even though our Heart is starting to ask wait a menuit Am I guilty of some of these things??

And than comes my favorite verse, actualy the one that brings me to my knees and to my relization of my need of a Savior as much if not more so than those He just mentioned

Romans ch 2 v 1
Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things.

This is not a verse commanding us not to Judge, it is a verse revealing to us that we have judged and that is evidence that we hold the truth and because we hold the truth we are guilty where we have failed our conscience.
And All MEN have Done this.
therefore Romans ch 1 v 18 applies to all Men
18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who (hold)(does not say suppress) the truth in unrighteousness;

Thank you all for sharing what the LORD put upon your hearts. I have been reading over the responses and will be seeking the LORD in prayer. Many good things have been said and I take them to heart :)

God Bless
maryjane

Hi MaryJane, I would really encourage you to listen to "Hell's Best Kept Secret" by Ray Comfort. It's one of the sermon recommendations listed on the right of the home page here on SI.

I don't have a "canned" routine and set of questions that I ask people. I try to listen to them and to the Holy Spirit. Every person is different and every conversation is different.

Pilgrim

Our Lord Jesus, the prophets, apostles and disciples always tried to make sure the enormous problem of man's sin was understood, before sharing the good news of God's love and grace. God told Isaiah, "Cry aloud, do not hold back, declare to my people their transgression"(Isa.58:1). In the sermon on the mount Jesus expounded on the moral Law of God, showing the spiritual nature of it, that anger is murder, and lust is adultery in God's sight. He reasoned with the woman at the well about her adultery and fornication(John 4:16-19). He reasoned with the rich young ruler regarding his sins(Mark 10:17-22).

If someone tells me they are not that bad, I ask them if they have kept God's moral Law(if they've ever lied, stolen, used God's name in vain, used profanity, looked with lust, committed fornication, gotten drunk or high, loved other things or people more than God, etc).

If they say they haven't done any of those things I tell them that God declares there is none righteous, all have sinned and come short of God's glory, all we like sheep have gone astray from God. God gave us a conscience which tells us right from wrong and it tells us we are guilty of sinning against God. The penalty for our sin is death and damnation in a place called hell. But God made a way by which He can forgive us, and that is through the death and resurrection of His Son Jesus Christ. If we repent(confess our sins to God in sorrow and turn from them) and trust in Jesus Christ we will be forgiven and saved from our sins and God's wrath.

If they still seem unreceptive I simply leave them alone and pray for them.

Charles Spurgeon said, "But more, there is war between you and God’s Law. The Ten Commandments are against you…The First one comes forward and says, “Let him be cursed, for he denies me. He has another god besides me; his god is his belly, he yields homage to his lust.” All the Ten Commandments, like ten great pieces of cannon, are pointed at you today, for you have broken all God’s statutes, and lived in the daily neglect of all His commands. Soul! You will find it a hard thing to go to war with the Law. When the Law came in peace, Sinai was altogether on a smoke, and even Moses said, “I do exceedingly fear and quake.” What will you do when the Law comes in terror, when the trumpet of the archangel shall tear you from your grave, when the eyes of God shall burn their way into your guilty soul, when the great books shall be opened, and all your sin and shame shall be published? Can you stand against an angry Law in that day?"

How do you help them to see and understand that even if they never …. embrace the fallen ways of this world they are still a sinner and JESUS must be the priority of their life

This is a big challenge. I don’t think we get far by talking the language of works and morals because everybody has their own moral code operating in their consciences. Also, there is a strong tendency to justify or deny.

I’m not convinced that pointing towards some bad deeds – proves anything to an unsaved person. Does a lie committed when you were 5 yo, in itself, throw you into hell? Really? How convincing is that? I think we need to apply a more indepth perspective of human fallenness.

What about the sin of unbelief? The remedy? We are justified by faith. But how do we help unbelievers see the need for such faith – or even want it? Surely evidence of faith must be apparent in Christian living if we wish to demonstrate its value. Otherwise people simply see our faith as a form of superstition.

Having “little faith” was a serious sin problem to Jesus. We are familiar with his rebukes. Yet in Christianity unbelief easily escapes the criteria of bad deeds – as well as these symptoms of “little faith” seen in the gospels:

-Failure to perform miracles – ex healings
- Lack of miracles in your “home town”.
- Fear and anxiety in times of storms
- Worry about basic needs – food, clothes, etc
- Worry about tomorrow
- Failure to grasp the spiritual meaning of Jesus’ teachings

Could we not say then, that to the extent that we as people of faith demonstrate the above symptoms and fail show evidence of faith (like miracles), unbelievers have no reason to believe us when we say they need faith in Jesus?

Diane

I think that is an excellent observation, Diane.

Could it be that Christendom has come up with all kinds of formulas and techniques for "convicting" people because the power of a holy life are absent? Essentially, the Holy Spirit is absent in many lives.

Rom_15:19 Through mighty signs and wonders, by the power of the Spirit of God; so that from Jerusalem, and round about unto Illyricum, I have fully preached the gospel of Christ.

Also, the power of God in an individual's life manifested during persecution brought many to Christ. Many have been saved because they saw an other-worldly reality in those that were suffering.

Have we become great "talkers" and "debaters" but lacking when it comes to "love in action (love with power)?"

1Co_4:20 For the kingdom of God is not in word, but in power.

Pilgrim

MaryJane, you do not need to be able to perform miraculous healings or suffer severe persecution to be an effective witness for Christ and win souls for His glory. If you wait for that to occur in your life it is likely you will never step out in faith and obey God's clear command to share His gospel with precious lost souls needing to hear.

Sadly, it seems that for some Christians, the lack of miracles or severe persecution is simply another excuse not to obey God in His great commission. We are not to follow miracles or persecutions. God will allow those things to follow us if He so chooses. Not all instances of God-honoring gospel preaching or witnessing in the Bible were associated with signs and wonders or persecutions. For example, there were times when Paul preached the gospel powerfully and did not perform any miracles or suffer persecution(Acts 13:14-49; Acts 17:22-34).

There have been many times throughout church history when God has raised up Spirit-filled preachers of righteousness who did not perform miracles or suffer severe physical persecution, but who preached the gospel mightily in the unction of the Holy Ghost. I would submit that God is more interested in His gospel being proclaimed with His anointing and souls being saved than He is in performing signs and wonders or bringing severe persecution. Granted, once a Christian really starts to obey the great commission he/she can expect persecution to follow one way or another, but not necessarily to the point of martyrdom.

But I would definitely agree with some who have posted here that the power of the Holy Spirit is crucially important in our witness for Christ. That power comes through prayer, the Word, and obedience.

But what if someone is already walking closely with God and just needs advice on how to witness biblically and effectively. Do we just tell them, "just follow the Spirit's leading"? Should we not consult God's Word to learn His blue print? In other words, even after you are walking in the Spirit you still need to search the Scriptures to learn certain biblical principles of God-honoring witnessing or evangelism. The Spirit and the Word work in harmony with one another. As I look back I realize how much heartache I would have saved myself in my early years of witnessing for Christ if I had learned some biblical principles which I learned later.

"How do you share with a person who does not think they are that bad a person? How do you help them to see and understand that even if they never get involved with drugs, alcohol, lustful living, hate another, or embrace the fallen ways of this world they are still a sinner and JESUS must be the priority of their life."
Will have to say it is good for him or her to know the issue is far greater than the sin issue. It is a relationship that will be of a profit for him in this life and that which is to come. Because angels do not sin does not mean that they do not daily need God. Of course sin must be working on him though he / she did not know it. But when He or see the need of Jesus Christ in His every day life like sees the need of water to quench taste He will reveal measure by measure with the help of the scripture the depravity of his heart. When hes knows that He need Jesus not only as a savior from sin but as a guide protector in the things and issues of this life. For a good and happy family he /she need Jesus. For safety in the car she or she drive She need Jesus. For direction in the best and most profitable work he /she need Jesus. When she or he is sick and doctors have no way out still Jesus can make a way out. There are millions other means that can be used to bring him or her to the saving knowledge of Jesus. For example in africa here some come to Jesus because of fear of witch craft power and Jesus uses that to bring save them from their sins. JESUS is needed in everything and every issue of this Life and that which to come.

Mary Jane,

These verses, all spoken by Jesus, may help you:

Mark 2:17: When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

Luke5:32: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

I know this may not help you a lot but rest assured Jesus encountered this mindset as well. And what did he do? Apparently, he did not pursue them because there is no record of such. In the meantime this is something you will have to leave with the LORD and let Him work it out to His satisfaction.

Jesus says, "If I be lifted up, I will draw all men unto myself".