anyone struggle with a hardened heart before?

sermonindex Aug 23, 2012

I know i have probably asked this before, but i would like to ask this again because i really am struggling again with this and just want to know for encouragement sake if anyone has ever experienced a hardened heart before towards the things of God and God before and actually come back to God restored? Also i will sum up some of my struggles and this is what i am considering a hardened heart so maybe someone could tell me also of a similar struggle. I have experienced over the past 5 years a struggle as i read the scriptures almost like a spirit within me doubting God's word and hearing a voice say it is not true what i read, i have begun to start desiring the things of the world again and my spiritual eyes seemed to have been darkened heavily where i struggle to believe at all, my biggest struggle has been that i have been having the last 2 years constant evil thoughts towards others and have struggled of being able to care about others problems and when i do hear of others problems i struggle with something i really cant explain but the spirit or me almost thinks it is funny what happens to others or like a laughing spirit, i don't want to think like this, but this is what happens to me and i do hate it but it is getting relentless and tormenting and i don't know if it is all me or some demonic, but i know this has been caused by some of my disobedience in the past. I feel as if i am the only one who has ever had this struggle, it makes me feel terrible and i really feel i have no power over it.

sermonindex Aug 23, 2012

I dont me to be repetitive, but i what i am going through is torment. All i am seeing in my life right now is someone who is overcome by sin in my heart and wickedness, it is not necessarily that i am doing a lot of outward acts that are sinful as much as i am inwardly struggling with seeing myself begin to see myself look like the person described in the big list of sins in galations ch. 5, romans 1, mark 7, etc. and at the same time remembering me not being like this before, but slowly seeing how evil i have become, it is terrible. What makes it worse is all the evil thoughts about others i have all the time and the laughing evil spirit doesnt help. What makes it so anguishing is over the past few months i began to have for the first time in almost 9 years of my professing christian life a disciplined devotional time of prayer and reading scripture alone with God and i have never have had such a strong prayer life, but it seems the more i seek the farther i get away from God and the more hardened i get. including all the struggles with my health problems which our constant for, which i believe our demonic actually. I really don't know if God has rejected me for good, or if he is going to have a dramatic deliverance for me, but if you were in my shoes it is not looking good and hasnt looked good for a long time. I just hope their is hope for me.

M

MaryJane Aug 23, 2012

John wrote:I just hope their is hope for me.

____________________

I don't have answers for you except to say I will pray for you. I have gone through times of having a hard heart and the LORD has brought me through so there is always hope. In CHRIST there is always hope.

If I were in your shoes honestly I would just laid hold of JESUS and spend every waking moment holding tight to HIM.

God bless
maryjane

J

jimp Aug 24, 2012

hi, in the old covenant, noone looked at those that needed their sins covered. they looked at the quality of the sacrifice... unspotted lamb. we have the perfect son of the living God as our sacrifice who did not cover our sins but took them away ... as far as the east is from the west.STOP looking at your sin and look at who died for you. looking unto Jesus,the author and finisher of our faith.there is no strength in the law, it is the leven that leveneth the whole lump. your sins are forgiven when you die to youself and turn the rule of your life over to Jesus.jimp

S

SonsofLevi Aug 24, 2012

Hi,
What you are going through actually may not be as bad as it appears, by what you have said it sounds like the Holy Spirit is "brooding" over you, and that God is getting you to realize your own insufficiency, viz., stirring up care and concern for others within yourself, loving your neighbor, etc. And no doubt we naturally try to "perform" for God. The truth is that we cannot perform for Him, nor stir up any true virtue within ourselves.
Sometimes God has to let us go on like this until we wear ourselves out trying, and finally make an absolute surrender to His Son Jesus Christ, that He might perform "for" us and through us, and replace our lack of love and virtue with His love and virtue. Basically God says, "alright, you've shown me what you can do, now I will show you what I can do." God already knew you couldn't perform for Him, that's why He gave you His Son to do all the performing.
If I could recommend a book that would help you through this, if you truly want helped, read a book by Andrew Murray called "The Two Covenants and the Second Blessing". You can log on to the Christian Classics Ethereal Library, ccel.org I think it is, and read or download it for free. Or order it online, whatever you choose, but I sense strongly this would be a good read for you and what you are going through.
May the Lord bless you.

sermonindex Aug 25, 2012

this site has really encouraged me it is called netburst.
http://www.net-burst.net/guilty/blasphemy_testimonies.htm

But, anyways it is so weird, over the past week as i have even been seeking God about this, i have noticed my heart has got really bad again and i have even struggled with anger towards God and that hasnt happened much in my life. I really feel as if God is done with me, then you read testimonies of others and you get encouraged. If i wasn't losing my desire for God this would not scare me as much.

J

jimp Aug 25, 2012

hi, stop looking at your condition start looking at your position... seated with Him in heavenly places.being egocentric is a sure sign of future failure. you must have faith in Jesus and not in your ability to do anything well for His strength is made perfect in weekness. it is good to be weak. You must have faith in Jesus alone.jimp rejoice in the Lord.

J

JLBennett Aug 26, 2012

@bible4life -- I'm not sure if you've gotten closer to Christ since you've written this but I am struggling with the same thing. I am a recent convert and I find Romans 7 very comforting because you are not the only one struggling. We, as the body of Christ, are confident that He who began a good work in us will finish it until the Day of Christ Jesus. Fight the good fight and finish the race. Let us set aside the sin that easily besets us and run the race that is set before us with patience. Fear the Lord; and trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not in thine own understandings but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight. I have been struggling with disobedience also and it is a fight, not a comfort. I have been struggling with hardness a little but read Hebrews 3:13 and understand what the Word of God says. It's hard but you MUST obey. I say this to myself also.

sermonindex Aug 26, 2012

A hard heart is a heart that does not listen to the truth.

I wish that you would go and find a deliverance ministry somewhere. Don't pay heed to these guys that say that Christians can't have spirits. They talk great swelling words about how Christians can't have a spirit while you continue to be tormented by them. All they can offer to you is mere words, what you need are some brothers that have faith who have the gift of discernment to find out exactly whats going on in your life and if there are strongholds in there, they will cast them out in the name of Jesus.

Don't bother trying to garner ideas here, get out there and look around for a ministry that deals with this in your community and believe me when you do all hell will break lose to convince you that you don't need to do this. But persevere, it will be worth it.

I've gone through a deliverance session and I survived what other Christians told me that I was going to fall headlong in unbelief and more devils would come in and all that other foolishness. They told me to stay away from these ministries, I was glad I went. I've watched others get set free from tormenting devils and they are living witnesses that God will set the captive free.

If you really mean business with God, ask God to lead you to a deliverance ministry in your city and get out there and look for one knowing that God loves you and wants you to be set free from those things that torment your mind and soul.

This thread will turn into a debate about Christians can't have devils vs Christians that can. Don't pay heed to any of these dialogues, get out there and get the help you need, freedom is possible. Know this, it's not found in debating, it's found in the power of God. Now....

GO!!

M

MichaelLiao Aug 27, 2012

Dear Brother,

The thing about a true Christian is that his heart has been changed from a heart of stone to a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:25-27). That new heart that God gives you will never harden in His grace. In Jeremiah 32, God said that He would put the fear of Him in His people so that they WILL NOT turn away from Him. In other words, the true Christian's heart will not harden nor turn away from God unto the very end of His life (Philippians 1:6). The true Christian has God's Almighty Spirit to CAUSE him to walk in obedience to His will. Every true Christian is not able nor willing to turn away or harden himself to God because he is a new creature! He has the nature of God in him and therefore will walk in accordance to His nature, His will, and for His good pleasure! Now Brother, hearing from what you're saying, you are not hardened and that the Holy Spirit is at work in you. I don't think a hardened person would be concerned about whether he is hardened or not. A person without the Spirit of God working upon him would not care about his own heart. I know exactly where you are at the moment because I've been in the exact same situation as you are. Asking those questions. The only way you are going to get out of where you are is if you renew your mind in what God has done for you in Christ and who you are in Christ. That the power of sin has been taken out at the Cross of Christ and you are now under the power of the Spirit. You are no longer a slave to sin (a man who can't help but sin) but a man who is under the power of righteousness (you cannot help but be righteous). You are now under purely the grace of God, not law. That pure grace causes sin to have NO DOMINION over you! (Romans 6:14) It's 100% grace. One thing that you should do and it is very simple, is for you to sit before the LORD at this moment and ask Him, "Lord, how much do you love me?" Ask that until HE COMES in His love. I believe that the only answer for you is the Love of God, plus nothing! That's what began to set me free, is to see how God sees me in Jesus Christ. It's not do this or do that or go to some ministry for help or other religious activities, but the Love of God is stronger than all the forces of darkness. Go there and be alone with Him. I hope I have offered some help here. Please, know His love and ask Him to come and meet you. God loves you and longs to love you more and more.

God help us all....

You Servant in Jesus' Name,

- Michael Liao

sermonindex Aug 27, 2012

Thanks Michael I agree i really need to know the love of God. I think my view of God the last few years has brought me to fear him in a negative way, i believe we most definitely should fear him, but i believe i have been lost even since i came on sermonindex a few years ago in the sense i haven't heard the voice of the Hoy Spirit as much leading me almost barely, before i heard his voice clearly. I think that is why i seem to go in circles, i need to hear from God. I also agree with approved i believe i am under demonic attack and have been for over5 years, but this last year and 3 or months or so has been tormenting.

P

proudpapa Aug 27, 2012

RE bible4life wrote ///i really need to know the love of God///

I would Highly encourage you to listen to this message by
Denny Kenaston, I could not find it here at SI so I will post the Charity link, When you get to the page just press on the red link button.

The name of the message is "The Fathers Love"
I would encourage you to listen to it untill you have a breakthrough, I would also encourage to consider possably Fasting untill You have a breakthrough.

http://charitychristianfellowship.org/sermons/title/the-fathers-love

sermonindex Aug 27, 2012

thanks a lot. Brother Approved if you want to email you can.

sermonindex Aug 30, 2012

I had another bout of what i call hardness of heart on tuesday and yesterday. I started doing better on saturday, sunday and monday. But, anyways on tuesday i went a bible study at a church and a sual i struggled with evil thoughts towards others while i was their and then as the bible study contined i was doing better, but then after bout an hour i noticed i began to get bored or tired of reading the scripture and the really scared me, why was i getting bored and didnt desire the scripture anymore. Then yesterday i was doing pretty bad overall spiritually and i was reasding a ermon by George Whitfield and i noticed how i really didnt have any interest in reading it and didnt have the desire to do so. See that is what scares e is that sometimes i will desire to be into the things of God and other times i seem to not get into it. Also these constant evil thoughts happening makes me feel so terrible. Saints please pray for me, i dont want to fall away.

sermonindex Aug 30, 2012

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Because these countless threads are contradicting themselves over the last 4 yrs, I feel it's important to point this out.
Some of this thread and other threads are saying that these problems are fairly recent and some details are missing from some of these multiple threads that cover the same topic.

This part of Michael Liao's post is right on:

The thing about a true Christian is that his heart has been changed from a heart of stone to a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 36:25-27). That new heart that God gives you will never harden in His grace. In Jeremiah 32, God said that He would put the fear of Him in His people so that they WILL NOT turn away from Him. In other words, the true Christian's heart will not harden nor turn away from God unto the very end of His life (Philippians 1:6). The true Christian has God's Almighty Spirit to CAUSE him to walk in obedience to His will. Every true Christian is not able nor willing to turn away or harden himself to God because he is a new creature! He has the nature of God in him and therefore will walk in accordance to His nature, His will, and for His good pleasure!

The only exception I'd make to Michael's post is that some are attacked for short periods with doubts.

Data: "Bible4life" .... Saved 9 years. Besides countless posts about all of the Bible teachings/sermons acquired for free for all of these years and a steady innumerable amount of prayer request threads that read about the same for the last 4 yrs ...

Below Posted on April 16, 2009* - Joined: Aug 13,2008 aka 'Bible1984' = 4 years here @ SermonIndex -- [*emphasis mine below]

Quote:

""I have told everyone my problems *many* times and i hate to tell people this but they have only got worse.

I have seen my self just grow worse and worse, my heart has become hardened and i can't hold onto my faith at all anymore, even when i try it is impossible. I am seeing myself fall back into my old sins and not being able to get out of them.

I have this hatred in my heart towards people and i do not serve god anymore, and if i tried it would be fake.
*I mean when the lord came into my life 5 years ago i was changed, my desires and my life towards him,
* but not even 2 months into it i fell into sexual sin*,

got married 3 years later to an unbeliever and since then it has been as if i have been living a curse, i get attacked by demons all the time and do not have no power over them. I have had me and everyone pray for me to no avail.

Was it my lack of knowledge that got me in this and why has God not forgiven me and given me the ability to have faith, has he given me an evil spirit to not believe. Was i even saved from the beginning or was i only awakened? I see my flesh taking over me and me being desirable to sin more than living for the lord..........."" etc.

https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=28385&forum=35&83

*Jan 16, 2009 - earlier that same yr - Not counting those that preceded these ---

Quote:

"Brothers and sisters i know you have read this from me before.."

"I don't care too much more for anyone anymore, i even hate people and am very angry at them and have no remorse for it" etc.

https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/newbb/viewtopic.php?topic_id=27509&forum=35&15

I have personally known a few people over the years that have lived in rebellion from early on in their "christian life" and eventually, after so many years, they become totally Miserable, because they fear Hell but didn't and don't want to sacrifice whatever it is that GOD had/has put His finger on from early in their 'walks' - and these people begin to fulfill the saying "Misery loves company" and from that certain point on. And rather than submit to GOD, they find that all that they are capable of is to make others Doubt GOD and His Saving Power.

While we are still breathing - we need to Get Alone with GOD and not come out until we have commited All to Him and find the deliverance that comes with true Salvation.

An innumberable army of Saints have been posting prayers and counsel for 4 yrs on this same issue. There's enough Saints praying and have been - but it's time for John to stop asking humans to do the work for him and get down to some mature serious business of Seeking The LORD GOD .... *Whatever the cost* and for nothing else but true Salvation - with the fruit of repentence and a two sided Relationship with a GOD where he actually begins to Love Jesus for what He sacrificed for us - which will result in obedience and sanctification.

Everything or anything else, he's already heard over the last 4 yrs and he has stated that he's already tried it all.

Sometimes the truth spoken in love Can hurt - but it can also save willing souls.

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sermonindex Aug 30, 2012

Thanks Jesus-is-God i do appreciate the rebuke. I do need to just look to Christ for this for now on.

sermonindex Aug 31, 2012

John, there's nothing whatsoever 'wrong' with starting from square one - absolutely nothing wrong with that.
There's nothing wrong with starting over and being sure that you're commiting the right way.
There's one thing about hearing so many sermons and reading so many things and also The Word - is that you now know the way of salvation - whereas, many have never heard of the Way.

Have been and will continue to pray with all of the others that, at the end, we'll all be together, giving each other high-fives and Thanking GOD that we made it.

Narrow is the way - but we'll determine to persevere, faithful unto the end - so Help us GOD ~ Amen!

Pray one for another.
It's not over until it's over, but as long as we Love Him - we're going to make it!

Bless you, and GOD Bless us all, until we See Him Face to face.

J

jimp Aug 31, 2012

hi, when Jesus said it is finished ,it was finished.QUIT LOOKING AT YOURSELF FOR ANYTHING GOOD FOR YOUR HEART IS DESPERATELY WICKED.. LOOK TO JESUS AND HIS FINISHED WORK AND HAVE FAITH. if you do not have faith that Jesus is who He says He is and can do what He said He can do in you ,there is no deliverance outside of this.jimp and yes i was shouting

M

MichaelLiao Aug 31, 2012

Jesus-is-God,

I just want to clarify, what do you mean by my posts being attacked for short periods with doubt? I don't quite understand what you mean Dear Sister.

Your Servant in Jesus' Name,

- Michael Liao

J

JLBennett Aug 31, 2012

Mark 5:1-15 is about the possessed man who confesses himself as Legion. Jesus rebukes the demons and they go into nearby swine. The point is, that you must confess your secret sin and your idol to Christ. Trust Christ. Confess these sins to Christ and if it His will, He will forgive you and you will be restored. I have been delivered from this by confessing and realizing that He is my only hope. Do so, brother, and realize that God can consume it with his holy fire and you may be restored. I have been more sensitive to the Holy Spirit more since I've listened to this advice from another brother in Christ. Jesus is the answer to such things. I have no wisdom, only Him.