This morning I was woke up very early before the sun was up by the sounds of wood snapping and then a large thud. I thought for a moment that my cat had knocked over my lamp and smashed into my window but when I turned on the light I saw the real weight of my sin before me...my closet pole had snapped from the weight of all the clothes hanging from it. I was astonished, this pole is more then and inch thick of solid wood, how could it be that I had so much on it that this would be the end results. As I began cleaning up and going through things I realized I had clothes that neither my husband or I had worn in years stuffed in the back. I suddenly felt very convicted of how "much" stuff I had. The fact that I had more shirts and sweaters then any one person could ever possible use was a realization for me. I had thought for a long while now that I had done better with spending habits, that I was only buying what I "needed" and not being so wasteful with GODS provision but this morning sorting through old clothes I realized that I had allowed my notions about "needs" and "wants" to be influenced by self and not in submission to HIS leading. How subtle this sin is in my life that I did not even see it before now. I realize that instead of buying a new top because of a "true need" when an old one had actually worn out, I was picking up a new top with the changing of seasons or because I wanted a new color. How often have I gone through out my day doing whatever I want with out seeking the LORD simply because I thought that buying a new top was to trivial for HIM to care or be concerned about..."IF" JESUS is LORD of my life then it has to be every aspect of my life. Nothing is to trivial, JESUS is my example and HE only did what the FATHER had HIM do...how often do I still take off on my own never praying, never asking HIM, or seeking HIM on the things I do?? HE does care and this has been a huge lesson for me this morning. As I finished cleaning things up I am reflecting on this much and praying for the LORD to really change my heart in this area and help me understand what it really means to be submissive in all things...in everything!!
God bless
mj
