I might add to what I wrote before.
I too have been where you are and so has every one else. Welcome to the insane asylum called earth
Often we have friends that are in to all sorts of things. Sometimes it's even our mate.
Learn from the lesson of Sodom and Gomorrah. The angels or messengers who came are like believers are. We're filled with righteousness that Jesus has placed there. We too can walk around among evil places and still have our values inside, even though evil is outside. It first appears as though the messengers were going to walk around outside but Lot pulled them inside.
Look at Christ. Filled with the Holy Spirit the righteousness of God and he too came to this insane asylum on earth. But this was where he came to work, and so do we. We work in the insane asylum just as he did. We must overlook others, "for they know not what they do".
Bitterness, and revenge are hard to overcome but Jesus will help you. The Father knows they can't be rooted out right away. First we must see which areas we can change and work there. As to bitterness, that takes more time. We all want to get even, settle old scores. Look at Jesus on the cross. He's telling Satan; Satan, you always wanted to kill me, so take your best shot". That's bitterness and revenge. Starts with a dirty note, moves to a rock, then a gun, then a bomb, and then death. That is one dangerous treadmill.
Meditate on not getting even. There comes a time when you have to let it go. As a child of God expect to be abused, cheated. Comes with the territory.
The reality.... They need Christ too. Jesus said "Father forgive them for they know not what they do". Those people killing him didn't have a clue why he was here. Satan did and he was behind it all. He's the root of bitterness and anger for he sees you going to your heavenly reward in the kingdom. He on the other hand can not go back. He was once there. Oh he loved the music and walking in the coals. He was great at Music. All of that is gone, no way back. Now you see why he wants you to be angry, to be bitter. He wants to destroy you. Put that in your head. Lay around and be bitter and angry and you will be caught up in his web of deception.
Feeling sorry for self is not good.
I have prayed for you