Decieved by self

So the last few days I have been sitting and walking in my own sin. Self pity, "feeling down", fearful, hopeless, and angry. All sin and all brought on by my own deceiving heart. When the "thought" first came up Saturday morning I should have taken it captive instead I held it in my mind and allowed self to give room to this attitude. By Sunday by attitude was worse but I didn't even see it. I was blinded telling myself I was the victim, life was unfair and my struggles were so much. On Monday it all came to a head so that by Monday night I was miserable and causing others to feel miserable as well. Where was my joy? faith? trust? and hope in HIM? I had pushed that fellowship with HIM aside and allowed sin to rule my heart with feelings of despair and self pity. This morning in HIS mercy HE has allowed me to see that the question isn't "can I do this" but rather "should I do this" and this question applies to my entire life and goes even deep to "why do I want to do this". There are many things I can do, but they are not good for me to do and they will not bring me into a closer fellowship with HIM. I have also learned that self(the flesh) is always there seeking to deceive me and cause me to take my eyes off of JESUS. I am learning that when I trust myself over the Holy Spirit, when I listen to me over the LORD JESUS, then I am truly in a dangerous place. The flesh(self) will always seek to serve that sinful attitude of "me" but through CHRIST JESUS if I learn to walk with HIM, to stay with HIM in every moment of each day and listen for HIS voice only then there will be life and light and understanding, then there will be joy, faith, and trust, and FELLOWSHIP!!

Thank you for allowing me to share
God bless
maryjane

Thank you for allowing me to share

No, thank you.

Sister, I wonder if you've had a chance to read Paul Wests' book on Understanding Mortification? It speaks very well into the very thing that you describe here with many Scripture references, I have personally found it to be very helpful.

In Christ,

Ron

Quote: I have also learned that self(the flesh) is always there seeking to deceive me and cause me to take my eyes off of JESUS.

And if we go deeper we find that sin remains..

If we are to experience the full power of what Christ can do for us, we must learn to die with Christ. I ought not, perhaps, to use that expression, "We must learn to die with Christ”; I ought rather to say, "We must learn that we are dead with Christ.” Andrew Murray...