Sister Linda, it sounds like you have your head screwed on right and will be able to discern from the Holy Spirit what spirit is in control of any fellowship you might visit:-) The problem occurs as I am sure you know, when we are lonely and desperate for company and are willing to "turn a blind eye" to the red warning flags.
And to be clear I am not wanting to war with anyone on the Calvinist side or the Charismatic side...and strangely I have been in both camps at different times of my life:-) I am in neither camp now but I see strengths and weaknesses on both sides. Over it all I have come to love my brothers and sisters in all these various and sundry camps, but that does not mean I am unaware of the dangers of getting involved with calvinist churches or charismatic churches.
I am sure you will agree that "you gets what you gets" in these different church systems. Just go into these things with your eyes open but know this, you will be very, very hard pressed to find many people who are not tainted by and conformed to the systems of men and the religious spirits behind them.
Not saying it is all wrong and not saying anyone is going to hell, just saying to be very careful. I have so many stories I could share with you that it would fill a book lol.
Please take brother Waynes personal advice to heart about the reformed church across from the street from him. If you do choose to go...enter at your own risk:-) Brother Greg has been around the block a time or two as well and is only speaking out of a concern for your safety, he is not trying to be prejudice or run any churches into the ground. Its a safety thing...please understand:-)
And consider brother bears words too..."If you can find one or two other believers that have this sweet relationship with Jesus. Meet with them when you can."
May you be led ever so carefully by the Holy Spirit and may you be quick to run at the first sign of religious spirits seeking to control you or force you into their mould. Stay firmly and securely at rest in the only mould that matters...being conformed to Christ!!!
I am in constant grief over the numbers of believers who have been attacked by religious spirits...from all camps..and succumbed! They do not even know that they have been shipwrecked but they are...lying fallow amongst the reefs at the bottom of the ocean. Most people think that it is those who have succumbed to outward sin that have shipwrecked their faith, but I would contend that there are more...many more who have become shipwrecked in their faith because of religious spirits who have succeeded in getting them to take their eyes off Jesus and placing their trust in Christ PLUS something else.
And btw, I have found that no denomination or group, including house churches are absolutely free from these religious spirits. I am a part of a very small home fellowship and I find myself fighting off these spirits all the time. No-one is safe, and to him who says he is...that is a sure sign that he isn't:-)
I pray that the Lord will lead you and guide you to a local spiritual family where you can love and be loved and grow up in all things unto Him, Christ the Head.