As I drove thru LA's many highways earlier today I knew I had to share a bit of testimony.This forum is a church, it IS part of the Great Ekklesia, it is the Body of Christ, and we do pray for the well being of this ministry, and those who tend to its needs.That said, as I contemplate what to write, and what to share, I am a bit reticent, beacuse it IS a non-exclusive GLOBAL internet forum.I have no fear of being transparent, but it is wise to be prudent.When I got saved three years ago, I was seperated from my wife. A year ago, even after much much intercessory prayer she divorced me. My pastor and I had many talks and sessions of prayer, and we both decided, that I would just "lay down" for the whole proceeding, in no way would I contest it.The impetus, the rush for her to get the divorce, is that she met a man, who would not put up with her still being officially married.Since I got saved, I have not been involved with anyone. I was involved with Christian singles websites for a season, but the Holy Spirit has steered me away from this.My background is in the entertainment industry, and in the theater, specifically writing. Thats the family business. My wife's (I will not say "ex" wife, oh I've let go, believe me, but....) older brother had been my partner in the theater back home. I still have many connections with my theater, but I am no longer in leadership.I will be going back to Chicago to do a theater work from my pen. I am going back with a lot of trepidation, but I have been in much dialogue and prayer with the Lord over this endeavour, and He has assured me via His voice, and via His leadings that this is what I should do.My brother is a terrible poly-abuser, terrible. It's so sad, because I love this boy, but when I look at him, it's like he's marked for death. His half brother by another mother is now in jail for attempted murder on his other half brother. It's a long sad sordid tale that involves alcohol and drug addiction, and one brother pouring another brothers brandy down the toilet and the other brother in a blacked out drunken rage burying a knife in the other's back while he slept. The stabbed brother lived, thank God, but the other brother is in jail. (if I may sidetrack; about four months ago, God had me call the brother, lets call him Ralph, the one who's in jail now. He wasn't in jail, but he was drinking to die, and God had me call him to witness the love of Jesus and the abundant provision and mercy that provides to those who are enslaved by their addictions. either Ralph wasn't listening or I am unfit and unworthy to proclaim this great salvation. I will be writing Ralph, and I will continue to proclaim to him that the Blood of Jesus is what will wash his soiled garments and clean his soul of this horrible sin.)But back to my brother in the theater, lets call him Sam the poly abuser. Everybody in my theater back home is an unrepentant sinner to whom Christ is at best an irrelevancy, or at the worst a tool of the self-righteous. Most of the guys back at the theater abuse grass, marijuana. Beloved, in the past I was chief among these sinners, the worst of the worst, but I don't even feel any temptations to pollute this temple of Christ. Thats not my battle.As I type this out, I'm wondering why I am. I feel I must testify, because today, I felt likeI was losing my mind or having a nervous breakdown. Last night as Sam was talking to me over the phone he was getting drunker and drunker, very disturbing, and he was talking about his sister's upcoming marriage to this new man of hers. (my wife) and then he said something that just stuck in my craw, this man has a son, and my bro-in-law Sam said that this mans son will lead my son "astray"...those were his exact words, "astray"....that didnt hit me until today.This morning it was difficult for me to get into the Word, I couldn't write, I couldnt clean the house, I couldn't do anything, I felt like a mental patient. I tried talking to Jesus, and I didnt have ears to ear, it was a nightmare. I than called my (ex) wife..(there, I did it..."ex") and told her, very calmly, "I think I'm coming a bit uncorked today". She said, "you sound mighty calm for somebody coming unglued". I replied that's the Lord in me. I then told her what her brother had said the night before. She then said, "thats strange because last night , Joe,( the man she intends to marry) said the same thing to her, except he was wondering if my son will lead his "astray".It was then I realized that something ugly in the spirit realm is happening, that the enemy is prowling afoot in my family, extended or otherwise. What I'm to do in the naturalI don't know, except for this; To pray for God to have His will in my life, and to pour me out like a drink offering if it is His pleasure, to continue to pray in the Holy Ghost, and to walk as the Lord Jesus Christ did. Thats it.I called my sister in law who's saved, described what I described to you, and asked her to pray for me. She said she would, then God had me pack two sermons, downloaded and burned from this precious site, (actually one is from fireonthealtar, a Michael brown sermon) but the one I started to listen to was dear brother Duncan Campbells "Revive Us Again" (I wrote it down on the CD as "Go Thru with God"....lol)and something miraculous happened as I motored thru Los Angeles listening to dear Duncan speak of God's sovereignity in the matter of revival, I forgot all about familial nightmares, and uncovered unrepented generational sin, I began to get steeped in the Spirit of God, I began to think of my dear Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ, I began to think about the work God did in me, I began to think of the personal revival God has done in my life, and I beg him, use me dear Lord, continue to clean me up and make me fit for His service.Jesus is so wonderful, I love Him so much , and I burn, I ache to proclaim so great a salvation.I long for the day when God heals my family, Dear Jesus, save my whole family Lord, please turn them from their sin and their addictions, and adulteries, and divinations......please Lord, what I say I mean, if it pleases the Lord, I will preach the Gospel in hell, if He saves my whole family. I know what that pledge means, I DO.But that is love, and now I understand what Jesus REALLY did for us.Please, I ask you, my cyber family in Christ, pray for this orphan, pray for me in the Spirit with groans only the Spirit can understand, and I pray for you all now.....In Jesus Name, amen.
