A question on divorce, remarriage

If a marriage has been annulled due to deception..what is scriptures view on this..can the person remarry.

Here's an old thread on the subject that is about 22 pages long. The best way to read it is print the pdf and save it to your hard drive and read it that way. But the subject never did get settled, I thought SpitFire made very logical and valid arguments.

But what YOU will have to do is seek God through the Scriptures, prayer and trembling in your secret prayer closet to find the answer.

Here's an article that might help.

Divorce & Remarriage: A Position Paper
by John Piper
http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/divorce-remarriage-a-position-paper

God bless,
Lisa

Hi Lisa...heres my question..if a woman desires to have children and the man she marries has deceived her into marriage and cannot have children..where does that stand before God

I won't comment here on the Bible and believe maybe you will arrive at a Scriptural answer if you know this:

Annulment is the recognition in law that the marriage was procured by a fraud that goes to the ABILITY of one party to consent to the marriage. It is not mere deceit. For example if Doug marries Sally but after the wedding Doug is really the groom formerly known as Debbie, Sally was unable to consent to a matter that goes to the heart of marriage contract, i.e., the identity of the other party. ("I intended to marry Doug, but married this person who changed his name and gender identity.").

That example opens up other legal issues but you get the idea.

Now if Sally married Doug and only after the fact discovers that Doug is a homosexual and they never consummate the marriage is that such fraud that the parties lacked the ability to contract? No, generally, although you would probably get some courts in the south still to say it was out of pity to Sally. I had that situation and the court would not permit annulment so they divorced. The young lady was a lesbian and lied to the groom thru courtship so he would marry her and get her away from her dad. Two weeks after they married she said "Hey I am a lesbian and I used you and thanks but I'm out." The court essentially reasoned that it was buyer's remorse not fraud that goes to the ability to contract for marriage.

Bottom line: if two people cannot form a marriage because one of them is unable to consent, are they truly married before God? If no, I think you have your answer

I found nothing in Scripture to answer your question directly. But I did find Scripture relating to deception and marriage.

Deuteronomy 22

13"Suppose a man marries a woman, but after sleeping with her, he turns against her 14and publicly accuses her of shameful conduct, saying, ‘When I married this woman, I discovered she was not a virgin.’ 15Then the woman’s father and mother must bring the proof of her virginity to the elders as they hold court at the town gate. 16Her father must say to them, ‘I gave my daughter to this man to be his wife, and now he has turned against her. 17He has accused her of shameful conduct, saying, "I discovered that your daughter was not a virgin.” But here is the proof of my daughter’s virginity.’ Then they must spread her bed sheet before the elders. 18The elders must then take the man and punish him. 19They must also fine him 100 pieces of silver,b which he must pay to the woman’s father because he publicly accused a virgin of Israel of shameful conduct. The woman will then remain the man’s wife, and he may never divorce her.

20"But suppose the man’s accusations are true, and he can show that she was not a virgin. 21The woman must be taken to the door of her father’s home, and there the men of the town must stone her to death, for she has committed a disgraceful crime in Israel by being promiscuous while living in her parents’ home. In this way, you will purge this evil from among you.

28"Suppose a man has intercourse with a young woman who is a virgin but is not engaged to be married. If they are discovered, 29he must pay her father fifty pieces of silver. Then he must marry the young woman because he violated her, and he may never divorce her as long as he lives.

Jacob and Leah ?? that marriage was not anulled because of deception.

It does not get much more deceptive than to believe that you are marrying someone and find out that it was someone else whom you married.

And Jacob deceptivley pretended to be Esau and stole his blessing but it was not anulled because of the deception.

One of my friend's married a girl whom's former boyfriend dumped her because the Doctors told he she could never have children.

She got pregnant immediately after they got Married and they now have three healthy children .

Not sure what Esau has to do with the question but Jacob acquiesced in keeping Leah after he protested to Laban. It sure looked like Jacob might say "This is is not what I worked for and you lied to
me." Instead, when Laban told him -- genuinely or not -- that Leah had marry first as the eldest daughter Jacob accepted the deceit in order to acquire Rachel in 7 more years.

Papa's point is important. A marriage can be void from the get go when the law itself is violated by the marriage as in a case of bigamy or marrying your sister (neither of which was unlawful in Jacob's day). But a marriage may be valid yet voidABLE where, for example, I thought I was marrying Sally but -- oops -- I married Sue who pretended to be Sally or who I just was not sober enough to recognize was Sue when we went to the Elvis impersonator chapel in Vegas. I might, though, acquiesce in the whole deal. I might decide "Hey, Sue is alright." In that case the marriage is not void from the get-go, but may be voidABLE by me. That is more akin to what happened with Jacob and Leah. That would cover a case of certain limited kinds of fraud. Once Jacob said "Okay, I'll keep her," he validated any fraud or inability to consent that might have been involved.

by trueblue
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Hi Lisa...heres my question..if a woman desires to have children and the man she marries has deceived her into marriage and cannot have children..where does that stand before God

Only God knows the intricacies of your heart and your husband's heart in this situation. It seems that you may be looking for a loop-hole that no human can give you. Seek God through prayer and fasting.

Can you stay with the man never having children, never adopting (is he willing to adopt because there are so many children looking for good parents today), totally forgiving him, never to bring up his deception again? God can bring you to this place if you are willing to stay and forgive.

TrueBlue, I will be praying for you.
God bless you,
Lisa

I was praying for you while getting ready for work. "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your heart..."

I've got to get to work but I wanted to plant this seed. Our God is a miracle working God and He can redeem your marriage and your heart and your husband and even you! :)

I've got to go, I will write more later.

God bless you,
Lisa

sorry let me elaborate...this not pertaining to myself..the marriage was annulled through the courts..the question is can she remarry..i know this is a challenging topic

RE : /// Not sure what Esau has to do with the question ...///

When Jacob married Leah he thought he was marrying Rachel likewise this happened in the irony and parallel of reality catching up with him in that we remember that :
when Isaac gave the Blessing it was intended by Isaac to go to Esau,
Jacob went so far in his decieption as to out right lie and say that he was Esau ! Genesis 27:19 .

It was Isaac's intention, his desire that the blessing would go to Esau but Jacobs lies and deceptivness to pretend to be something he was not in order to steal the blessing from Esau did not nullify the blessing

And likewise in Joshua 9 : When the the inhabitants of Gibeon deceptively lied and pretended to be something they where not and made a league with Joshua, the league was not nullified because they had been lied to and decieved.

I think lisa's advise has been good ! (and we do not no all the details of what is going on,
( there has to be more going on than fertility)

but if people want to take a legalistic approuch on the subject , These are some examples that quickly come to mind

add for clarity

Papa, chalk it up to me being a bit thick-skulled. I don't see the comparison as fitting, but we both DO know that there is a biblical instruction to accept the wrongs done to you and forgive. I don't know the person's situation here in the OP about annulment. Not every annulment would necessarily be supported by biblical grounds to allow for remarriage, but I do know of situations where annulment may have been available but the parties didn't seek it (divorced instead) and remarriage would have been (in my own judgment, which is woefully inadequate) properly allowed under even very strict readings of the New Testament language (which is how I tend to read things concerning this topic).

At this distance, the only thing I am comfortable offering is grace. These things get murky quickly from here.

RE : /// I don't see the comparison as fitting///

The comparison's fit in so much that deception and clear out lies did not nullify anything in those examples that I gave.

There is another issue that is not being discussed in this thread and is vital to this discussion and that is who sanctions a marriage ? the State ?

Does a legal annulment by the State mean anything if not done on Biblical grounds ?

add : I would say that if neither one of the two has since being Married to each other defiled themselves with someone else than I would encourage them to seek reconsiliation.