Need Reassurance and Encouragement

Hello users of sermonindex, This is not my first time on here talking about this, as you all know I a struggle with porn.

The longest time I've ever been without watching porn was the end of last year (Christmas) until March. Since then, I've had 2-3week increments of stopping porn and falling.

Recently, I've fallen all over the place; every time I did fall I repented and got back up. About 2 weeks ago I felt free and very joyous only to fall again. I'm really sick of the cycle and (low-key) feel that God has had it with me. My thoughts have gotten darker and my conscience is slowly drifting off of the things of God, every time I do it. Is there any help or advice or ANYTHING anyone can help me with. I don't want to leave God, I don't want this to be over. I want to pursue and grow in God unto my death bed. Now im experiencing some of the consequences of this addiction.

~It feels I've hit rock bottom.~

God bless.

Key,
Whenever we are bothered with something in our life,and we know it against God, ... The Word of God,..
Be thankful that The Lord' Spirit ,...His 'grace' is still showing / drawing you
by His Spirit.
He is trying to 'SAVE' you from this.

I had some things,....I thought were really pretty things in my home once, ....my heart was just wrapped around them, the coloring they had just picked up other colors around in the room,...and I am not saying that there is anything wrong with this for others, not at all,...but The Lord ,..grace,..started drawing me not to have this,..I guess it was because it was too dear to me.

I feared the Lord, would not continue His dealing with me about this,..or perhaps anything else,..it was like (2) pulls in me,..one against, and one for,.....so I got down on my knees and told The Lord that I could not do this,and that I did not want Him to quit talking to me,...and I cried out,..
Lord !...I know your way is right and mine is wrong,..please help me.

I gathered up things took them to the dump..broke them,crying all the while.
Came back home, and a Scripture flowed into my spirit,..

2Pet. 1:19,
, "until the day dawn, and the day star arise in your hearts:"

I did not know at the time what He meant.

But a peace just came over me,...I looked it up,and thought much on that.
The Lord has shown me some of what He meant...in different ways.

But, you know what,..after that, a most amazing thing happened,.. I could not care less for them things,...completely out of my heart.

So , I beg you, don't defy The Lord, get down,..cry out to Him,..ask Him to cleanse you,.....remember, we are calling on His Name,.....when we ask for His help in His righteous judgements that are needed in our lives.
( His Name is all His righteous judgements)
He wants to help us,...it is not His will that anyone perish.

Now, O'Lord, I ask you help this man to cry out to you and resolve this matter now,....
deliver this man from the hold of darkness, and bring him into your MARVELOUS LIGHT !

🛐

-------------------
elizabeth

Hello Key,

Appreciate your honesty and desire to be freed from this besetting sin. I would recommend a few things:

-Slowly meditate through Romans Chapter 6-8. Take a couple verses at a time and pray through them, digesting each truth. Live in those passages until they completely assimilate into your inner man and your mind is renewed in them.
-Do as Jesus commanded, and deal ruthlessly with this. If it means you get rid of your computer, smart phone etc then DO IT. I don't know what line of work you are in or if you need a computer, but install special surveillance software on it and ask a brother (I am assuming you are a brother) to check in on you. Give them access to your computer.
-Study the Fear of the Lord. This was probably the greatest factor in understanding how to flee sin for me.
-Get into a small group of men if possible and have weekly accountability

Our Men's ministry will be taking 150 guys through the Conqueror's series from January to March. Deals directly with this.

Don't give up, don't give in. Jesus is Greater.

Key,

Based on what you wrote I would suggest you need help to overcome your addiction. Addictions whether it is alcohol, drugs or porn often need help from others to get free.

Ultimately help comes from our relationship with the Lord, but you need to get practical help from other brothers to hold you to account, particularly those who know how to.
Steve Gallagher (who has sermons on SI) runs a ministry called 'Pure Life Ministries' to help in this specific area. Why don't you check this out and get along there to get this sorted out.

http://www.purelifeministries.org/

Also you need to cut off anything that has been the medium for this activity. If a computer, then trash it if you cannot control it.