Salvation and maybe dying (Prayer request)

Greetings,

I would like to ask for everyone to pray for me. I've drifted away, technically speaking became apostate during last few years. Done more terrible things that I would have never believed myself doing. I've tried to pray for Jesus to have mercy on me and bring me back and been stuck with repent, fall, repent fall merry go around during these years which has led my heart to harden.

Now I have a reason to believe that my time has come, as the wages of sin is death. It is likely that I am suffering from a cancer that has spread already.

As much as I would like to stay alive for my family's sake and because I feel like my life was wasted, albeit I am still young. However, regardless if I live or die please pray that God would renew me and set me free and wash me clean and that I would hear His voice again.

I walked away from God for 6 years. Did terrible things, became addicted to heroin. I was so angry at God, any time I saw or heard any mention of Jesus I would say "I'm glad they killed Him!"

But I thank God it's been 6 years now that Jesus took me back, forgave me and calls me His son.

If you can still call out to Him, if there is even a faint spark of hope, don't let it go out. Keep asking Him to help you and have mercy.

If you like, I know a really good online prayer meeting where you can put in requests; it's Tuesday at 7:00 pm Eastern time. Go to tsc.nyc and click on Worldwide Prayer Meeting.

I'll be praying for you.

Dear Eze20,
"The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
A broken and contrite heart
He will not despise. " Psalm 51:17

Receive his forgiveness, dear brother. He loves you and wants to restore the joy of His salvation.

Praying for your healing as well.
Sis Leslie

https://www.summitrdu.com/message/the-making-of-a-witness-jonah-31-10/

This may be of some encouragement to you.