The Need For Fellowship

Dear SI community,

I live with my wife and three children in Kyle, TX (located 10 minutes south of Austin). Like many, we have had a very difficult time finding fellowship. We long for it, seek for it and, have visited a number of churches in the area. Unfortunately, all of our experiences have been disappointing.

I'm not new to the Faith and don't have unrealistic expectations of finding a place w/o faults. It's just been really difficult to find genuine New Testament fellowship. At this point, I've somewhat (not entirely) given up on finding meaningful fellowship within the "typical" church framework. I'm not even looking for a defined "house church" setting. I just want/need a few other believers that love the Lord Jesus, study and obey the Word of God, have a heart for the salvation of unbelievers and long for the coming of the Lord.

I'm reaching out to you saints to ask if you know of anybody (s) in this area who are serious about the Lord. I don't intend in any way to sound judgmental or "holier than thou" I just want to be with serious Christians and I seem to be having a difficult time finding any. I know that there are some here.

On another note, I want to thank each and every one of you who post edifying content on this forum. Encouragement is such a need among God's people and sadly it seems there are very few (unfortunately, including myself) who give it. Let's continue the fight to make SI a place where weary pilgrims can find refuge from the world, embrace and encouragement from the household of the faith, heavenly food and drink; through the living and abiding Word of God. SI has certainly provided these for me.

As the age gets darker, the need for love and encouragement among the saints needs to proportionally increase. Let's take heed to Paul's word in Ephesians 6 that our warfare is not against flesh and blood (i.e. one another) but against principalities, powers, against the rules of the darkness of this world, against the spiritual wickedness in high places. Satan loves nothing more than to take the eyes of the church off of executing Christ's victory over him, and instead pit us one against the other. "Now thanks be unto God, which always causeth us to triumph in Christ, and makes manifest the savour of His knowledge by us every place" (2 Cor. 2:14)

"And the God of peace shall bruise Satan under your feet shortly...."
written to the Church in Rome.

Hi Brother Abey,

You're in my prayers.

I have some friends who live in that region of Texas. One friend lives in Cibilo (just northeast of San Antonio). Another works on the northside of San Antonio but lives in Floresville. Others live in New Braufels. I have other friends and even relatives who live in that area. I'll try to ask around.

Now, any suggestion might be influenced by those individuals' particular beliefs about doctrine. Doctrinally-speaking, Baptist, Pentecostal and Calvary Chapel churches are, well, Baptist, Pentecostal and Calvary Chapel in their very "we believe" sections of their websites.

So, the doctrine preached from the pulpits of those churches will "fit" a set of standards held by those churches. Those standards will vary in terms of how intricate they are and how strict the conformity requirements might be for fellowship or full membership.

As such, if someone recommends a Baptist church, it will undoubtedly be Baptist in this respect. The same is true of any denominational/fellowship church and most non-denominational churches.

When I move to or visit an area, I look up churches as soon as I arrive. I'll use everything from the Yellow Pages (phonebook) to web searches. Yet, I'm always aware of the doctrinal aspects of those churches (which are usually found on their websites or within the denominational websites).

From your post, it seems like you're already proactive with this anyway.

On a personal level, I don't really ascribe to any particular denomination. I feel comfortable among believers no matter their backgrounds -- even if I disagree with some of the doctrinal stands of a local church or fellowship (which might itself be ascribed to a larger denomination or fellowship). If anything, I try to remain a bit hesitant about fellowship in a church that strictly mandates its particular (and non-essential) doctrinal views.

I don't look for a church that will welcome me into their official membership. Rather, I like to fellowship with believers who will fellowship with me as part of the Body of Christ -- even if we might disagree over certain non-essential matters.

This is why I've found that house churches tend to be more open to graceful fellowship -- embracing the brethren even if there are minor or even sharp disagreements over non-essential issues. I love it when believers (especially pastors) treat one another with humility in such matters. We all mature over time. Even some of the things that we once accepted as dogmatic might not be quite so indisputable as we mature in the faith.

When I was in college, I fellowshipped with a congregation where the pastor felt this same way. There were people in that congregation who were pre-trib, mid-trib and post-trib. They all loved one another.

Yes, each person could explain what they believed (and usually why they believed it), but the church didn't take an official "binding" stand on it. The same was true of other things that simply aren't essential or agreed upon by all believers. I always felt refreshed when I attended.

Again, from your post, I think that you already understand these things anyway (and you're probably of like-mind about it too). I think that you "hit the nail on the head" when you mentioned ENCOURAGEMENT. That is one of the reasons that the author of Hebrews mentioned a need to fellowship all the more as we "see the day approaching" (Hebrews 10:24-25).

I've often thought about believers in the centuries past. How did they fellowship with one another? What was it like for the Jews during the captivity and diaspora? What was it like for believers in the early church? What about believers who settled parts of the world where there just weren't any (or many) other believers?

It's my thought that they fellowshipped in the Word with one another. So, until you find a local fellowship, I'd encourage you to set apart time with your family (even everyday) for Bible study and prayer.

My wife and I enjoy this. We get together and worship, read and pray together every morning (and sometimes at night). It's really the highlight of our day. Now, we don't have children (yet), but we are committed to continuing this practice even when we do eventually have children.

It became even more important to us as the churches in our area and state (Silicon Valley in California) were shut down due to COVID restrictions. We never lost fellowship with one another or the Word. We found encouragement by speaking by phone or even Zoom with one another.

I apologize for the length of my post. However, I just want to encourage you by letting you know that many people are in the same position that you are. We'll remember you in prayer too (and ask that you remember us also). If I hear back from family and friends, I'll pass along what they tell me.

I found a couple of churches near you.
Here are the links;

http://tobc.org/

http://oakhillpbc.org/about-us/

Thank You Savanna for those links. I have researched the Texas Oaks Baptist Church before and am acquainted with someone that grew up in the Oakhill Primitive Baptist Church. I have driven past both those locations on numerous occasions.

Although I am not at all opposed to church suggestions, I am more specifically interested in individuals that you saints from Sermon Index might be familiar with.

I do appreciate your taking the time to do research on my behalf.

Greetings in Christ brother Christopher,

Thank you very much for your most encouraging reply. It is indeed comforting to know that we are not alone in our struggle to find like-minded fellowship. And yes brother, I think you and I are like-minded on much of our approach to fellowship within the Body of Christ.

To address your question with respect to the "kind of fellowship" that we are looking for, I would say that I think much the same as you do. I want to benefit from the riches of the Body of Christ and therefore don't ascribe to any particular denomination and by extension denominational belief system. This allows for the freedom to fellowship with all who name the Name of the Lord in truth without, like you said, having to proscribe to everything that might be laid out in their "Doctrinal Statement". I am looking for believers who study the scriptures, want to grow in their knowledge of the Lord, and generally want to please Him. I think most everything else will work itself out from there.

The only topic that I have a really strong position on (one which I don't wish to discuss on this forum in accordance with the Guiding Principles) is Calvinism. I just won't/cant' sit under a preacher who teaches it. I do know, love, and fellowship with individual believers who hold that view, but I won't be part of an assembly that adheres to that framework.

I had the amazing privilege of being part of an assembly that practiced the "Church Life" as close to the New Testament as I almost thought possible. There was no single pastor, but a body of elders who served the brothers and sisters and did not Lord it over the flock. They were so discreet that it would often take months for a new attendee to know who was in the leadership. According to 1 Corinthians 14, all could testify in the assembly one by one. Talk about Encouragement. It's one thing to hear encouragement from the same person (who often is paid to do just that) week after week, and totally another to hear what God was doing in the lives of individual members week after week. We partook of the Lord's Table/Supper weekly and met in one another's homes. It was a really glorious time. Sadly the elders serving the saints in humility started to disappear and they begin Lording their authority over the flock and the atmosphere changed. Previously the elders emphasized the Lordship/Headship of the Lord Jesus Christ but increasingly they asserted their own authority. Having genuinely come face to face with the blessing that God pours out on an assembly that honors the headship of His Son is something that leaves an indelible impression upon you. A.W. Tozer wrote a small booklet called "The Waning Authority of Christ in the Churches." It very accurately describes a lot of what I feel to be the condition among so many churches today. There is a "doctrinal" exaltation of Christ, but not so much in practice. If Christ is not exalted in practice as well as doctrine, can that assembly truly be a Church as laid out in the Teaching of the Apostles?

I've gone on long enough. I would welcome any contacts that you might have in the areas that you mentioned who Love the Lord.

Thank you for taking up the burden to pray for us. My wife and I will also keep you in our prayer.

What an awesome testimony about you and your wife being in the Scriptures daily! May the Lord grant your prayer that that practice would continue into your having children.

Grace to you.

Hi BrotherAbey,

I wanted to update you that I am still waiting to hear back from some friends and family members. I did hear back from a couple of them, but they didn't have suggestions (because they are searching for a church for themselves and their families).

What I would recommend is to remain in prayer and personal/family Bible study (as I am confident that is the case) and to do some searches through a search engine and even the phone book. I trust that the Lord will lead you and guide you.

Please allow me to make a couple of suggestions: Have you ever visited a Calvary Chapel fellowship?

In my experience, they tend to focus on studying the Word during meetings (which is different from churches where speakers focus on topical sermons). I've visited quite a few of them and this seems to be something similar to all of them.

Calvary Chapel fellowships focus on Bible teaching and are less dogmatic when it comes to non-essential ideals. Still, they do tend to cover all relative notions when it comes to Bible doctrines. They are also not proponents of Calvinism or hyper-Calvinism (although they don't seem to take a dogmatic position on opposing it).

To get an idea of what they are like, you can hear messages by men like Chuck Smith (the founder of Calvary Chapel) or Skip Heitzig. Here are messages from SermonIndex from both:

https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/mydownloads/viewcat.php?cid=273

https://www.sermonindex.net/modules/mydownloads/viewcat.php?cid=189

There is a Calvary Chapel fellowship in nearby (to your family) San Marcos, Texas. They are located just outside the Texas State University campus.

http://www.calvarychapelsprings.com/about.html

There is another CC fellowship located in New Braufels called "Riverside Calvary Chapel."