I'm asking God to change me. I suffer from Autism and I'm asking God to removes this limp from me. God gave Jacob a limp. Could this be my limp. I want God to change me. People think I'm wierd and a creep. I need help it feels like God wont take this thorn in my flesh. I'm praying and Its like no answer?
Jy'Quan,
You say you want God to change you. What do you want Him to change you into? Someone witty and charismatic? A person that is loved by everyone?
Jesus said "If the world hates you, you know that it has hated Me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love you as its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you"
Brother, just follow Jesus and don't look to yourself constantly thinking about the personality that you have been given by God. Autism is just a name given by men! Church history is filled with saints that in this day and age would be given the "autistic badge". Take men like George Fox, Lorenzo Dow and Evan Roberts for example. These men shook towns, cities and nations for God! They did not worry about their personalities as Jesus was their all consuming passion!
Blessings Steve
I am wondering how were you informed about your autism and if you underwent standardized or formal neuropsychological testing for this?
I hope you are doing fine, certainly the Lord cares for you and knows the difficulties you have. Keep trusting, He knows how to meet your needs and keep you safe.
Information about your age group or other things that maybe too personal for you, if you won't mind sharing them, can make
one help you better.
A Doctor told me
Life indeed can be hard especially with an impairment. This passage can be too familiar for being quoted too frequently, I hope it will root deeply in your heart:
PSALM 23
1 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
Take courage, "...Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts." Many times we have to dare, trusting in the grace and mercy of God.
Quote: I want God to change me. People think I'm weird and a creep. I need help it feels like God wont take this thorn in my flesh. I'm praying and Its like no answer?
Keep on asking he can and will change you.
The reason I say it is because I have been changed so much, if he can to do it for me, he can do it for you.
I couldn't really talk with people and I know people thought I was a bit weird, but they were scared to say anything to me as I had a wicked temper and would just beat people up if I was pushed past the limit I could take.
When I say a "a wicked temper" I mean that I would completely black out when I snapped and could not remember what I did during that time.
I didn't drink alcohol and asked doctors for help but they couldn't help me, they just told me to go play tennis to burn of energy.
I was worried that I may come round from a black out and find someone dead at my feet. However this liability was the thing that caused to seek help from God.
God sent someone from a tea estate from Tamil Nadu, India to a small fishing town in the North East of Scotland. He came and knocked on he Pastor's door and said God has told me "to come here and preach ant your church"
The Pastor allowed him to preach and as I listen to his testimony, I thought that's like me at the end of the sermon he asked for those who wasn't walking a righteous life to stand and he then prayed for those who were standing and a unknown force struck me on the chest and knocked me form my feet. When those around me got me back on my feet I was trembling and shaking and was soon back on the floor and getting a Devil cast out of me.
I will always remember the taste in my mouth when that devil came out. I was changed forever, I could look at people in the eye and talk to them and I haven't been violent since then and that was 30 years ago.
I am free.
If he can do that for me, he can do it for you.
I feel brother SteveHale's comment is not properly fitting in here, sadly (possibly from being under informed of what Autism entails). We have a 5 years old autistic son and as I thus care for him (he is heavily depended I have found), I am often brought to great soul vexation by how difficult he gets (hard to put to sleep, tantrums, little knowledge of danger, averse to many foods, etc). And I have often ended up praying heartily that God would heal him.
I love brother Collin Murray's testimony. That is something that people who are either infected or affected by autism would greatly appreciate. I am in contact with a 73 year old Christian acquaintance (also in the spectrum) in the UK who proves vetted in and is actively sharing information on how diet and supplements can lessen the pang of autism (and cannot wait to see how it improves our son's state).
Espeecially when we know that God may choose to leave the thorn (if is one indeed) at times. I read that while God so worked mightily to do wonders through Smith Wigglesworth, his daughter was left out and she remained deaf!
While a devine intervention is most preferred, an earthly intervention that can bring a near devine impact is also appreciable. I hope to send you a direct email, brother Quan to hear how you are getting on and whether or not you would like to be connected to the said old lady. But yes I agree indeed that a complete healing from God through Christ should be ever desired above all.
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