Having a child while living in fornication

I am a believer and have been a single dad for 12 years. Before I was a Christian I lived with my daughters mom for 2 1/2 years. We were engaged. But she changed her mind and we were never married. I have been confused when some people have said we were married in Gods eyes, and sometimes I thought I could not marry. I know this was not true. We lived in sin. This hurt both my daughter and i. Was there any in my situation in the early church and wonder how they would handle it. Thoughts prayers and encouragement would be great!

Jeffery: Let me encourage you. Yes you formerly lived in fornication. But if you have turned from it and trusted in Christ for forgiveness, then you are forgiven and that sin is in the past. Obviously your daughter came from that union, but you have to understand that God foreknew her and your circumstances before the foundation of the world and she is a blessing to you and has a calling from God on her life to know Him and do His will. Receive the forgiveness that God has given you and look forward to what He has for you now and in the future.

Blessings:

Thank you for the encouragement.

Hi Jeffrey,

Was there any in my situation in the early church and wonder how they would handle it. Thoughts prayers and encouragement would be great!

In John 4:1-42, Jesus was speaking to the Samaritan woman at Jacob's well. Most preachers and teachers would focus on Jesus's words about "living water" or the need to worship the Father "in spirit and in truth." Still others point out the fact that Jesus was interacting with much-despised Samaritan -- and even stayed in that town (by the Samaritans' invitation) for two more days. However, I would focus on what he said to the woman.

...

16 Jesus said to her, "Go, call your husband, and come here.”
17 The woman answered him, "I have no husband.” Jesus said to her, "You are right in saying, ‘I have no husband’;
18 for you have had five husbands, and the one you now have is not your husband. What you have said is true.”
19 The woman said to him, "Sir, I perceive that you are a prophet.

John 4:16-19 (ESV)

...

In this, Jesus pointed out that he knew this woman. He pointed out that she had been married FIVE times and that the man that she now had was "not your husband." Now, we don't know for certain who this woman was with (whether she was living in either fornication or adultery). However, it seems that she "has" a man who is not her husband.

So, cohabitation is NOT "marriage." This is true even if a child is born out of wedlock (which is why a child would be considered "illegitimate" in the first place -- as per Hebrews 12:8).

Obviously, Jesus is "faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (John 1:9). When we come to Christ, we become a NEW CREATION. Yes, the hurt that you carried may still be remembered (and, at times, still felt). However, all is forgiven when you come to Christ.

Be encouraged in this, brother! My wife and I will remember you and your daughter in our prayers.

Thank you so much brother Chris. I had someone else use this passage to encourage me at onetime. It's a blessing to know that Jesus pointed this out in her life and we can learn by it. I have been hurt by more legalistic approaches to the subject almost feeling cursed.. Almost believing it myself. Because anytime I would try to date a Christian woman it would seem my daughter would always come up as a reason for saying no. Maybe I'm sharing too much. I learned to live out pauls teaching in 1 cor 7 when he says serve where you been called. But if the Lord gives opportunity.. ☺️

Lord bless