Hello my beloved family!Today I wanna speak a bit about what the Lord has been teaching me in hopes that you are encouraged by it.Excuse me if this post is a bit long but I pray that when you read it in full that you may have deeper appreciation for the Lord.
For some context,I have been a bit lukewarm for the past years basically since when I first believed. I've always struggled with connection(I think),never could quite connect with anyone on anything at least not in a deeper manner of trust just surface level relationship.This is my theory as to why I became lukewarm with the Lord.As we all know,this whole Jesus thing is not just rules or commands but a real relationship with a good God who is his own person with his own plans and wills.For the past 7 years I believe that I did not let God dwell within me in a deeper manner.This in turn caused me to fall into temptation many times over many years.I sought a deeper connection with porn and whatever brought me comfort and as I grew in maturity(concerning the things of Christ and who he is) I became more and more convicted but I am stubborn but the Lord is relentless.
I saw the Lord work in a woman in my church who I witnessed being miserable but one day she came to me with a smile on her face telling me God is good.I believe it was a prayer that was answered "Let me see your goodness in the land of the living." and as soon as she smiled at me those very words came to my mind even though I had forgotten I prayed for such a thing!This in turn caused me to go back to prayer(I had been neglecting prayer for so long for cause of my shame over my sin)In prayer I learned many things so quickly.
In prayer I saw that most of my prayer was "Me centered".I would pray by saying things like "Who am I that you should love a vile man like me?" Although this is true I focused more so on my failures and I saw myself through my eyes.In the end I learned that God knows when and how ill fail him but loves me all the same.Many other things he has been teaching me but I will speak on those in a later post.
The main point is that he taught me something especially special concerning my lukewarmness.I was reading Hebrews and this part cut me "Just think how much worse the punishment will be for those who have trampled on the Son of God, and have treated the blood of the covenant, which made us holy, as if it were common and unholy, and have insulted and disdained the Holy Spirit who brings God’s mercy to us."
This cut me deep because I had become that swine that didn't care for the precious gem.Not only that but it also said before that verse "And so, dear brothers and sisters,we can boldly enter heaven’s Most Holy Place because of the blood of Jesus. By his death,Jesus opened a new and life-giving way through the curtain into the Most Holy Place. And since we have a great High Priest who rules over God’s house, let us go right into the presence of God with sincere hearts fully trusting him. For our guilty consciences have been sprinkled with Christ’s blood to make us clean, and our bodies have been washed with pure water.
Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise.Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near."
You see when the author of Hebrews says "...with sincere hearts fully trusting him.."This part cut me deeper because I realized my shallow relationship with Christ is because I did not trust him as I should.This caused me to seek other ways of comfort which did not satisfy me.In all reality Jesus Christ,my Lord,is the only one who can satisfy all my needs.
Now this is why this post is titled "Lineage of Love" As I was praying a video from our dear brother Nabeel Qureshi(who is now with the Lord) was brought to my remembrance.It was a video where he spoke about having a dream of seeing Jesus.In it he speaks about how the Lord told him to give his little girl a sponge-bath.Normally she would love such a thing but he says in the video that she was terrified and wouldn't let her own Father wash her.Now Nabeel our beloved brother was sick with cancer,so he concluded that he was too fearful during such a difficult time.He noted that God was trying to cleanse him through such a difficult situation.He pointed out how he was moving through fear and not through trusting the Lord to handle all things for him.He prevented God from glorifying himself through Nabeel's situation.
I thought to myself.I am the same way;because I acted in fear and thought that God could not care for me so I went searching for other comforts.God wants to take me through my fear and to heal my broken heart and my dysfunctional heart so that through me he may glorify himself(which is my deepest desire!).Now this is the point about all of this.
Love is our lineage.Nabeel was faithful and loving and because of him I have been blessed (though he is asleep).The woman in my church responded in love to the Lord and because of her love for the Lord I was blessed!A lineage begins when one is born and the bloodline continues.Yet we who are reborn are not born by flesh or blood but we were reborn because we heard someone who loved the Lord enough to be faithful and preach a loving message to us.They too heard it and believed and all this message is traced back to when the Lord himself preached it.
We are not descended from kings or farmers or painters but we are descended from love.Love for the Lord is our ancestry.This is your encouragement:Remember who we are and where we are descended from.We are descended from those who were faithful enough and even if they preached with wrong motives still the loving message went out from apart from them.We are not united by race;by borders,by blood,by nationality,nor anything related to the earthly realm!We are united by a heavenly love and that love binds us together.Whether those who are dead or those still to come to the faith.Christ binds us together.As you have read this take note of this:That I too am continuing that lineage that Nabeel who is now asleep kept going and who that woman from our Church is going to continue.This is your task just as it was written:"Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works.And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near."
What you have just read is a lineage continuing and it'll continue through you and me and to the next generations until the Lord comes back.Persevere.Always pray.Always love.Be faithful.Amen